Precedence: bulk
Subject: Chalkhills Digest #7-20

          Chalkhills Digest, Volume 7, Number 20

                 Thursday, 22 March 2001


          a shamemess attempt at self-promotion
                     Wow. I'm Zapped!
                   River Of Dissension
                        Jump Jump
                   The Ugly Underneath
         Re: Brian was a quiet sort of bloke ...
                  Green with irritation
                      Your Member(s)
                   Yves Saint Itain't!
                   Just translating...
             Animal and having panic attacks
               My Other Train is Coming...
      Trivia Question....and No, there is no prize.
             The re-issues / Transistor Blast
        I'm Just A Laughing, Giggling, Whirlybird
                  Royalties on reissues
                Re: Tyler's reissue query
   The original influence on Andy: you will be shocked!
                     OT: Rutles Story
                      Killer Openers
                     Lyrics to Mates?
                 Let's get Small (Town)!
  Deliver us from the elements - Consequences influence?
                     re: "homegrown"


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Look who's jealous now.


Date: Sun, 18 Mar 2001 21:35:30 -0800 (PST)
From: Tyler Hewitt <>
Subject: a shamemess attempt at self-promotion
Message-ID: <>

ok, a shamless plug:
Anyone in the Chicago area can see my work at the
Evanston Art Center in Evanston, IL. It's part of the
Evanston Art Center Invitational, and runs from today
(3/18) through 4/25. I have 10 pieces in the show,
which also features the work of 3 other artists. My
work is upstairs on the second floor.
Evanston Art Center
2603 Sheridan Rd.
Evanston, IL
(847) 475-5300

Thanks for your time,


Date: Mon, 19 Mar 2001 14:02:07 -0000
From: "Smith, David" <>
Subject: Wow. I'm Zapped!
Message-ID: <>

Thanks to all who replied off- and on-list to my requests
for entry  points to Zappa. Jeez, I'm going to be busy -
or confused - for some time to come.

I was taken aback at the sheer variance of answers I got.
No one piece of work got more than a couple of votes. I
suppose when you release over 100 albums though, that's
the likely outcome.

I will persevere, mindful at all times of the danger of
forgetting to listen to the Swindonian Super-Foursome . .
Threesome . . . errrr Twosome

Vernon Hickle said:

> D.Y.F.H.I.W.P.U.T.D.T.S.A.F.K?
> I.D.W.T.W.T.T.T.F.O.W.S.I.B.R.  P.J.S.I.O.F.U.R.O.S.
> (Don't you f#$%^ng hate it when people use this device
> to save a few keystrokes? I don't want to waste time
> trying to figure out which song is being referenced.
> Just spell it out for us residents of Simpleton.)

You forgot to say please!


Deb Edmonds said

> I also did a Swindon XTC tour a few weeks ago for a visitor,
> and managed to sneak him in a pleasant evening meal with Dave
> and Ian Gregory.

Hey Deb - are you bringing them along to the "Wheel and The Maybe"
gathering in Oxford in May? Oh g'wan g'wan G'WAN!

Deb again:

> He also snuck down the alleyway behind Andy's house and
> touched "the shed".  Did you all know that the shed is green?

Oooooh, I'm coming over all Graham Norton . . . not sure about
iut being green though - haven't you yokels heard of penicillin?

> Thought I'd just mention it.  Not all visitors get these
> special additions to the tour - it helps if you are male and
> good looking though!

Oh well, one out of two . . .

On the subject of solo Beatles, Jim (groovedisques) said:

> McCartney's Band on the Run is the most enjoyable.  The title
> track, Jet, 1984 (or whatever year it is), and others make up
> 50% of the most essential "classic" power pop songs (you can
> round out the list with "Go All the Way", "Surrender", "White
> Lies", and another assorted half dozen).

Gutsy call that - few people admit to liking Macca's solo stuff
- mostly, IMO to do with fashion. It's not "cool" to like Macca's
overtly pop stance - especially in relation to Lennon's far more
"serious" output.

It always seemed to me that while Macca's solo stuff was always
compared back to the Fab four, Lennon's output didn't suffer the
same fate. Shame - anything is going to suffer with that sort of
comparison - I wonder what reception they both would have got had
the Beatles never been?

Now I don't want to start another war (wink wink) but what's the
general feeling on-list re Macca as a solo artist?

Smudge "Donning Hard Hat" Boy

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for
the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.
-Winston Churchill


Date: Mon, 19 Mar 2001 09:15:13 -0600 (CST)
From: Brown <>
Subject: River Of Dissension
Message-ID: <>

Ben Woll stirred up my hornet's nest with his exclusion of River Of Orchids
on his single AV/WS album:

<<I also think Apple Venus and Wasp Star are amazing
records, but that it could have been their best, most
consistent record yet if compressed into one CD.

I know I'll have ticked off the River of Orchids and
Church of Women fan clubs, but those two songs are
just don't do it for me.>>

Benjie, my ginger snap, I didn't mean to sound quite so harsh when I
chastised you for stating your opinion regarding River Of Orchids(my last
post, Ethel was a tree..).  If I did get my knickers in a twist it's because
I feel rather strongly about River Of Orchids AND its place at the helm of
AV1!  ..Now about boiling AV and WS down into one album.. I disagree on this
point as well.  I might transfer a song or two from one album to the other,
but I feel that there is enough quality material here to justify two albums.

There! you have *my* opinion.. now you can die a terribly confused man! <G>

I am starting my day with Nonsuch, or Nonsvch if you prefer..

I'm not disappointed at all-

Debora Brown


Date: Mon, 19 Mar 2001 18:06:49 +0800
From: The Worrier Queen <>
Subject: Jump Jump
Message-ID: <>

> Jessica Gluckman said:
> Anyone else like that where an album got either spoiled or, if you're
> lucky enough, enchanted for you because of somebody else?  Anyone dance to
> an XTC song at their wedding?  Anyone paint the words to "Blue Overall" on
> their walls after a breakup?  Anyone try to win someone over and send a
> subtle message by putting "Seagulls Screaming Kiss Her Kiss Her" on a mix
> tape?

How many of you took a jump into something because you'd been playing Jump
to motivate you?

What do you think?


Date: Mon, 19 Mar 2001 20:28:42 +0100
From: "Mark Strijbos" <>
Subject: The Ugly Underneath
Message-ID: <>

Dear Chalkers,

read and weep:

The Wombles are back on the agenda this week with the news that
they and their creator, Mike Batt, are backing the Conservatives to
win the next election. Mr Batt, who admits he is a bit of a joke in the
UK (sic ! - MS) but says he is taken seriously in the effervescent
world of German pop music, has written a Tory theme tune to
spearhead the Tory election effort.

the ugly underneath indeed...

yours in xtc,

Mark Strijbos at The Little Lighthouse


Date: Mon, 19 Mar 2001 15:22:50 EST
Subject: Re: Brian was a quiet sort of bloke ...
Message-ID: <>

Steve said:

> In #7-17 the Skylar King wittered:
> > Take for instance the band who did "OFFSHORE BANKING BUSINESS". That was
> definitely their 15 minutes <

Was that the Members? If so, I'd say their 15 minutes was the single "Working
Girl," which got a lot of airplay on MTV in the early '80s. Great little tune.



Date: Mon, 19 Mar 2001 15:16:32 -0600 (CST)
From: Brown <>
Subject: Green with irritation
Message-ID: <>

>From the highly strung, but basically nice chap, Mr. Green:
<<What is all this fuss with Zappa about, who cares about green tights, I
thought this was about XTC>>

Herr Zappa is rather dear to many of the XTC fans on this list.. you noticed?

..and about those moss green tights.. (with lip quivering).. I was and still
am very proud of my creation.. you can't take that away from me, you.. you..
blue meanie!

By in large, we do stay focused on XTC, as you shall see.. on occasion we
stray, Glen.. try not to let it ruin your day..

Piece to ewe two! <G>



Date: Mon, 19 Mar 2001 17:29:51 -0500
Subject: Your Member(s)
Message-ID: <>

In 7-19, Steve defended those erstwhile members of the Members:

> Nope, 'Sound Of The Suburbs' was their fifteen minutes, and I have to take
> issue with your dissing the band (although bear in mind that I've never
> seen the film concerned, so my attitude is purely based on the records that
> I own). They might not be right up there with the very best of UK 'punk'

Spot on, friend.  They certainly were not the most imaginative band to
emerge from the UK post-punk scene, but they could write some good songs.
"Offshore Banking Business" is actually an intelligent and witty
condemnation of the American monetary system; although the faux-ska feel
can be grating.  But for the most part, the breadth of their work is
decent - I too would place them as one of my favorites.  And let's not
forget the very minor college radio hit from (I believe) their third album
- "Working Girl": "she can go off to work, while I lie around the house in
the dirt, and she brings the money home for me - I'm in love with a
working girl."  My greatest fantasy.

A few issues back, someone mentioned a summer tour by Midnight Oil through
America.  I checked with the Ticketmaster (Ticketmaster controls
Bartertown) website, and it appears that INXS (with Jon Stevens), Midnight
Oil, and Men at Work (the 'chunder from down under' tour?) will be touring
across the U.S. this summer.  Only two dates have been confirmed, but they
will be adding others soon.


-Matt Hiner, Part-time Faculty
University of Akron
Lakeland Community College
"You have an extremely inquisitive mind,
Mr. Astronaut Glen."


Date: Mon, 19 Mar 2001 15:02:02 -0600 (CST)
From: Brown <>
Subject: Yves Saint Itain't!
Message-ID: <>

<<Do these groups have Mission Statements? Do the Mummers go 'round
advocating fashion sense?>>

Angie, I should think that the initial description of the Mummerteer's
ensemble would indicate that we have *no* fashion sense whatsoever!.. but
what a delightful sense of humor we have, hmmm? ..and good taste in music?
PALEEZ!.. don't get me started!

<<Dukes-Wardrobe, psychedelic bell-bottoms and tube-tops;>>

Tube tops!?!.. Christ! you'll tell me that leisure suits are coming
back in style!

I'd much rather wear a Mexican peasant blouse with those bell-bottoms, or
maybe one of those groovy Neru(sp?) jackets, done in paisley satin.. and
let's not forget the string of luv beads.. yeah..

Debora 'shield your eyes, children!' Brown


Date: Tue, 20 Mar 2001 00:13:51 +0100 (added by
From: Maurizio Villotta <>
Subject: Just translating...
Message-ID: <> (added by

I'm exiting my almost perennial lurking state to request the help of you all
(well, one of you should be enough...).
I'm translating all XTC lyrics in Italian, and as you can imagine it's not
an easy task. Even if you don't consider puns and the like, they're full of
references to English everyday life, and sometimes I just can't understand
what they mean. An example is this part of In Another Life:

"The cheeky builder
Calling with his quote
Or maybe a chippendale
On girls night out
Make mine the biggest pouch"

If somebody could explain what this means, I'd be very grateful.

Maurizio Villotta


Date: Mon, 19 Mar 2001 20:05:14 -0600
From: "Amanda Owens" <>
Subject: Animal and having panic attacks
Message-ID: <>

Here I go again with my cheesy lead-offs!

Joe Funk from smokey Jamaica did sayeth:
>Smalltown - a clunker?

Much agreed. IMNSO, one of the shining moments from TBE.

My hero, Mr. Strijbos did sayeth:
>At last, good tidings from Lady Cornelia!

*Kiss kiss* You're too kind!

> > Dear God, how long has it been since I've graced these hallowed halls?
>too long i'm afraid,  things just haven't been the same without you
>You wouldn't believe some of the stuff that has been going on here
>at this court. Heresy, blasphemy and the blackest of magick!

Well, seems I've arrived just in the nick of time in that case, ready to
spread my unusual brand of sunshine throughout the hallways.

Phil DeFloor did sayeth:
>Dave Gregory has written and performed a track called "October's
>Carousel" which appears on the 2CD compilation "Green Indians",
>for more information see:

Ooh, slurpy! Must proceed to check it out! And I must knock Dave's door down
for forgetting my birthday this year, the tosser!

And on this bubblegum pop thing? Why not get Andy to team up with the
Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears? Bet that'll bring the house down (as in
teenyboppers trashing XTC and those with a higher understanding of musical
genius lambasting Andy for stooping that low.)

Tis all for now,
Amanda C. Owens
XTC song of the day-Shaking Skin House
non XTC song of the day-Once In Our Lifetime-Texas


Date: Tue, 20 Mar 2001 08:39:49 +0900
From: "John Boudreau" <>
Subject: DISSmembered
Message-ID: <000001c0b0eb$1d321b00$625791d2@johnboud>

Steve Pitts wrote in regards to The Members :

>. Having said that, the first two albums of both The
>Members and Penetration are ones that I'd not skip over to
>get to something
>else when browsing my record collection

Agreed ... And they were quite a good LIVE act as well . I got to see them
once at My Father's Place on Long Island ( same club where I saw XTC ) one
snowy winter's night when even only a handful of fans managed to turn out to
see them . Had fun chatting and drinking with some of the band members after
the show . Fun times ...


P.S.  And there is an XTC connection . The drummer - Adrian Lillywhite - is
the brother of Steve who co-produced Drums &   Wires and Black Sea .


Date: Mon, 19 Mar 2001 21:22:59 -0600
From: Chris Vreeland <>
Subject: My Other Train is Coming...
Message-ID: <a05010401b6dc74d2fd5d@[]>

First off:

>(try saying it 10 times
>fast-go ahead, i dare ya.)

>parenthetically yours,


Sorry, I MUST get out more often...


Paul Culane notes:
>As many of you will know, Andy has been bashing around with a song called
"My Train Is Coming".  It's earliest incarnation (as far as I know) was as a
fairly straight demo recorded with full band during the Terry Chambers era,
but not taken any further.  Andy pulled the song out again to submit to the
soundtrack of the Phil Collins film "Buster" but it was rejected.  "Phil
Collins was going through his megalomanic phase and all the songs in the
film had to have him playing or producing or whatever" - quoth AP.

About a decade later, the song was again resurrected and submitted for the
soundtrack to "That Thing You Do".  Despite this fresh version cramming
every Hard Days Night musical cliche into the arrangement of the song, it
again failed to make the cut.

Andy is resigned to this Beatle-esque gem never seeing the light of day: "I
think it's God's way of telling me that song's never going to be more than a
B-side... or a C-side!"

Keen collectors can find all three known versions of MTIC on various
bootlegs, but it's to be hoped that at least one version of the tune might
show up the Virgin box set.
(end quote)

	I had the distinct pleasure of discussing this song with Mike
Keneally just the other night.
According to him, xTc recorded a version of this in the studio during
the O&L (oops! that was an  abbreviation) sessions, and that Andy
handed the Guitar to him, and he played on the track (note: he said
"I played the solo").  I nodded like I knew the version he was
talking about-- at first I thought I did-- but now I'm confused. (Oh.
Only just now, you ask?) I have heard three versions of the song, two
of which are obviously home demos, recorded with drum machines, one
of poor quality--very sibilant, one of better quality, and a third,
recorded with a live drummer. The drum machine demos are both in the
key of A and the version with the live drummer is in D. Andy really
had to screech on the one in D, as it's about out of his range. I
figured it to be the oldest of the bunch, hypothesizing that he came
to his senses, and lowered it three steps so he could properly sing
it on the subsequent versions.
	Are you with me so far? Do you know what this might mean?
Yes! That somewhere in the nether realm between idea and album lurks
a fourth (!) version of My train is coming, with Mike Keneally
playing guitar.
	There's a pretty fair chance that i don't know what the hell
I'm talking about, and that MK was referring to one of the three we
already know and love.

Any clarification would be most appreciated,

Chris "finding new ways to cram Hard Day's Night Cliches into MTIC
(an abbreviation)" Vreeland


Date: Tue, 20 Mar 2001 00:34:25 EST
Subject: Trivia Question....and No, there is no prize.
Message-ID: <>

Dearest Chalkhillbeings,

I noticed tonight (being the Dukes junkie that I am) that 25 O'Clock is
unique amongst XTC (attributed)  albums.
Can anyone tell me why?
P.S. Thanks to whoever recommended Apples In Stereo here!
I've bought "The Discovery of a World Inside The Moone', then "Tone Soul
Evolution'  and "Her Wallpaper Reverie" and they are all incredible!
Obscurely yours.,


Date: Tue, 20 Mar 2001 10:00:57 -0000
From: Dewi Thompson <>
Subject: The re-issues / Transistor Blast
Message-ID: <>


The earliest XTC album I have is Mummer, and I was just looking at
Amazon with the intention of ordering 2 or 3 more (ES, BS, and DAW
probably) when I see the reissues aren't out until the end of May.  I
now have to decide whether to buy them now, and miss out on the bonus
tracks, or wait until June to hear them.  Either way, it's not good

I don't think I can go over 2 months without hearing any new XTC so I
was going to get the Transistor Blast box set, but Amazon don't seem
to have it.  I've also had trouble elsewhere.  Has it been deleted in
the UK  already, or am I just not looking in the right places?

Any suggestions, insults, recipes?

As someone asked about the worst track on Skylarking, I humbly suggest
Dying.  It's a 50-50 chance whether I skip over that one when I'm
listening to the album, it's just a bit too maudlin for me.  I got
this quote from Andy on the FAQ, about Skylarking he says "A summer's
day cooked into one cake.".  I have to admit, sitting around
discussing someone dying isn't my idea of a perfect summer's day, but
that's just me.

bye for now


Date: Tue, 20 Mar 2001 10:32:39 +0000
Subject: I'm Just A Laughing, Giggling, Whirlybird
Message-ID: <>


In #7-18 unna opined:

> I would argue that there are no xtc songs that are not entirely perfect
in their presentation on the albums. And I would also put forth that each
album is in itself a different type of perfect <

When it comes to the studio albums, especially without the bonus tracks, I
am in wholehearted agreement. I cannot think of an XTC song that I really
dislike, nor are there any that I skip over. XTC are the only artists in
the whole of my record collection, with a canon of any size, to whom that
applies, and it is one of the reasons that I love 'em :) Tom, you can put
me down for 100% for all the studio albums, Transistor Blast and Fossil
Fuel, plus whatever percentage Rag And Bone Buffet works out at with the
two Christmas songs as the clunkers. Oh, and FWIW I can't believe you'd
pick Helicopter as a clunker, either

Ryan Anthony commented:

> it may be that Chalkhills Nation's FAVORITE band is the Beatles, followed
by XTC <

Indeed it may, but you can certainly count me out from that emotion. I
wouldn't put The Beatles in my top twenty, nor possibly top fifty, artists
and I would take XTC over them any day.

Brian Matthews repeated:

> And everyone is an atheist <

I do wish that you'd pack it in with this conceit. An atheist is someone
who doesn't believe in any god or gods, not someone who doesn't believe in
a particular god (there are plenty of words in the English language for
that situation, many of them acquired from other languages, funnily
enough). Of course, this may be one of those transatlantic language
differences at work, but I can't find a dictionary that doesn't define it
that way.

Cheers, Steve (an atheist in the strict sense of the term, and a pedant to

PS. Please accept my apologies for the following crappy disclaimer


Date: Tue, 20 Mar 2001 14:59:17 -0000
From: Dewi Thompson <>
Subject: Royalties on reissues
Message-ID: <>

Hi folks,

I was wondering what the situation is regarding the royalties on the
new reissues.  I know very little about the music business, but I know
artists don't always receive roylaties on reissues if the rights
belong to the record company.  In the case of XTC, does anyone know if
all the royalties go the record company or do our boys get their
share?  I certainly hope so.


NP Beach Boys  - Summer Days Summer Nights


Date: Tue, 20 Mar 2001 10:03:29 EST
Subject: Re: Tyler's reissue query
Message-ID: <>

Dear Hillsfolk,
                     Being the anxious type, I too was concerned where when
why what was happening about re-issues (see Tyler H. 7-19) and contacted
Virgin with said anxieties:-

>Sorry to trouble you but you could save me a few bob, so
>here goes. I believe Virgin are remastering all XTC's studio albums

Yes we are.

>  for release in Japan.

Yes, there will be a Japanese series

> Will these be released in the UK, if so when,

Yes - April & May

> and will they have the same packaging as in Japan.

Probably not.

> are currently advertising the
>remastered albums for release on 9/4/01 & 14/5/01 as limited editions.
> Shall I buy or will those limited editions be available here?

I don't know if either series is being released in the US. (US)
could be referring to either series (Japanese or UK) and may well be
importing them.  The UK series will be available in the UK.  There will be
a limited import of 1000 Japanese versions for the UK. Perhaps the initial
issue will have special packaging - but you don't need to buy the Japanese
versions unless that's what you want.

So that clears that up!

Also, does AP know that people go down his alley and touch his shed? Where i
come from that's a criminal offence punishable by loud shouts of "Oi leave my
sodding shed alone" and " don't you people have homes to go to". If you read
all this stuff, AP, I suggest some wire and a high voltage power source.
That'll bring the bounders to their senses!



Date: Tue, 20 Mar 2001 09:29:53 -0600
From: "Steve Oleson" <>
Subject: LAGNAF?
Message-ID: <>

Hello to ALL!
Today, I got my first C-hills since October. Glad to be back amongst
you again. Maybe I will start having XTC dreams again! I had a dream
about rats last night, probably inspired by the talk of Hot Rats, by
Mr Zzzzz!

It's beautiful here in Austin, right now: 53 F, with low humidity, and
totally clear, blue skies.

Happily, I have been sharing Austin with thousands of visitors who
were here for South by Southwest, our music festival, hereinafter

On Saturday night, I saw the return of the Soft Boys, at the Austin
Music Hall. EXCELLENT! They played and sang wonderfully, and the
between-song banter by Mr. Hitchcock was entertaining as ever. I gave
the concert an enthusiastic "two lighters up". The rest of the
audience enjoyed it too,

...proving once again, that a live performance by a great live band,
even including band members who liken themselves to " a potato"
(a-hem, Mr Partridge!) can be very exciting, and musically inspiring!

So, to the point... Being away for a while, I missed all the posts
about Wasp Star, and haven't had a chance to share w/ very many
like-minded souls, the more subtle beauties of WS. So, bare with me
(lagnaf, hehehe) and let me know if you agree with me about some

Of course, there are things we expect from XTC, interesting
compositions, peerless bass lines, clever lyrics, etc... Put those
things aside as "given". I want to rave about more subtle things,

...Andy's guitar tone, throughout the recording, ranging from
powerfully distorted in Playground, to monumentally clear in Church of
Women. It must be incredibly rewarding to have their own studio, and
to have the luxury, skill, and tools, to work on the tone and
overtones of each instrument, until it is EXACTLY what they want.

...the arrangement and production of Stupidly Happy. I love the way
the song evolves from the "simple" guitar riff, by addition of subtle
harmonies and percussion throughout the aural spectrum. It makes me
stupidly happy to listen to it!

Prairie Prince's intro and outro drums on My Brown Guitar.

...the arrangement of We're all Light.  ... the signature rhythmic
thing just before Andy sings "Doncha know?" ...the keyboards
throughout Were all light.

I love the rhythm section work on Standing in for Joe, and the
distorted organ! Play it LOUD!

...the composition of You and the Clouds. I love the way the guitar
and percussion parts float up and down, as if he is floating,
unhurriedly through the sky. Andy's solo!!!

...the vocal harmonies are celestial in Church of Women (not a pun,
they do evoke reverence for women, perfectly) The descending line,
starting at the fifth measure of Andy's lead. Wonderfully original! I
understand that B.B. King was the inspiration for this lead. (kidding)

Andy's voice, and guitar playing continue to improve. Cant wait until
the next release!

Enough for now. It's a great recording.

Steve Oleson


Date: Tue, 20 Mar 2001 17:20:34 -0500
From: "Michael D. Myers" <>
Subject: The original influence on Andy: you will be shocked!
Message-ID: <>

Chalksters and Chalkettes;

I made an unbelievable discovery this week.  I have known in my heart of
hearts for a long time that Andy Partridge sounds just too good to be true.
I knew that he could not be the clever guy we all had him pegged for, that
he must have stolen his songwriting ideas from someone.  I just could not
determine who that was.  So I undertook a search for the songwriter who
really influenced him;  the task I undertook was tantamount to searching
for the source of the Nile, or for the Holy Grail.

But the effort was worth it because I found that man.  A man who had hit
records when Andy was just a young pup;  but a pup who probably listened to
his transistor radio at night when he should have been doing school work.
Hence, he could not have avoided hearing the songs of a great songwriter
named Sonny Bono.  Yes, Sonny, of Sonny and Cher fame.

I was listening to Sonny and Cher's Greatest Hits this weekend (no, you are
not allowed to ask why I was doing this), and I tried to pay special
attention to the lyrics.  All of a sudden it hit me;  Andy has used the
same themes that Sonny used back in 1965-66!  The heartless rip-off artist!
I think you will see what I mean when I quote some sample lyrics from both
artists and lay them out back-to-back for your inspection.

1.  The "hedonistic, nature-as-godhead" theme.  First, witness Sonny's song
"Living For You", where he talks about nature and stuff:

The summer flowers were waitin'
The birds paired off for matin'
A bee was pollinatin'
And I was captivatin'
Like a silly fool
Wonderin' what to do

Then, take a look at the feeble attempt at a similar theme that Andy
reaches for in his minor work, "Easter Theatre":

Gold sun rolls around
Chocolate nipple brown
Tumble from your arms
Like the ground your breasts swell
Land awake from sleep
Hares will kick and leap
Flowers climb erect
Smiling from the moist kiss of her rainbow mouth

(I don't know about you, but doesn't it just fry you that some of the words
don't even rhyme in the second song?)

2.  The "historical reference, talking about famous people from the past"
theme.  Again, let's let Sonny go first, and I quote his album cut "Love
Don't Come":

The poets and the Socrates were spoutin' out their eulogies
About what to do
The troupers with their tangled hair were provin' that they didn't care
About nothin' new
And anybody claimin' kings would strum guitars and start to sing
But they were fooled
The vacuum of their fantasy had passed into the back, you see
That chaos ruled

Now, let's see how Andy addresses this concept in his recent work, "I'd
Like That":

I'd be your Albert if you'd be Victoria, ha ha
We'd laugh because each drop would make me grow up
Really high, really high like a really high thing
Say, a sunflower

I wouldn't Hector if you'd be Helen of Troy, oh boy
We'd laugh because each flame would make me grow up
Really high, really high like a really high thing
Say, a sunflower

Notice that Andy runs out of ideas so easily that he has to go back to the
whole nature thing again in this song..........

Well, what have we learned?  Sometimes, we make heroes out of people
because we think they are original artists with unique, new ideas.  In my
book, Andy has certainly dropped down a peg (or maybe even two).  I just
want to assure the Chalkhills community that I will continue my quest to
expose fraud whenever and wherever I uncover it.  There is no need to thank
me;  I do this for you.



Date: Tue, 20 Mar 2001 21:46:10 +0000
From: John Peacock <>
Subject: OT: Rutles Story
Message-ID: <>
Organization: The Nice Organization

Found a link to this - suppose that the Chalkers might share an
interest in it -
it's worth a read, but it's quite...

I had heard the story, but not in so much detail, and I'm actually
quite cross now.

What a bastard.

Oh, well,


Obligatory self-promotion thing:


Date: Wed, 21 Mar 2001 22:01:48 -0000
From: "Rory Wilsher" <>
Subject: Killer Openers
Message-ID: <003e01c0b252$9dd1ab00$2f4f063e@oemcomputer>


Deborah Brown asked

<<Speaking of album openers, which XTC album starters really rawk yer

And then went on to bore us with her favourites ;-)

So, in the spirit of apathy and revenge (how DO you have an apathetic
revenge? "I'll get yer back when I get 'round to it."?!),*(see below) here's

The Ballad Of Peter Pumpkinhead: but then, I AM a Nonsuchinista.
Wake Up: because that's exactly what you do.
Playground: because of those opening chords.

However, on the greater debate, XTC seem to have experimented largely with
two types of opening track: the "in yer face", noisy, ME ME ME type, as
typified above, and also includes Respectable Street and Runaways (when
those drums thump in is a sublime moment. See below part 2), or the Garden
Of Eden types (Garden of Earthly Delights, River Of Orchids, Summer's
Cauldron). As you can probably tell, I'm in the "Noisy" camp.
Notwithstanding which type of song you prefer, which other song do you
consider a missed opportunity for an opener? Much as I like Playground,
ITMWML would have made a great start to WS, IMHO. (Apologies to all AHs -
see below part the third.)


* Below: an ongoing experiment to see how many punctuation marks can be used
in a row. That's eight. Purists may argue against the use of ? and !
together. Also, do I really need that full stop? (you can flame me to tell
me to stop being so anal, but I already know ;-) I am, after all, an

Below part 2: OK, someone get technical on me and tell me it's a machine ;-)

Below part the third: AH = Acronym Haters.


Date: Wed, 21 Mar 2001 21:14:50 -0800 (PST)
From: Jeff Eby <>
Subject: Lyrics to Mates?
Message-ID: <>

Hey there, been a long time since I actually
subscribed to this list.  Usually the wonderful
Chalkhills site answers most of my questions but this
time I'm stumped.

recently I've been collecting tracks from napster and
I finally got enough to burn off a couple CD's of XTC
Demo's, B-sides and other goodies.  Now I'm collecting
pictures, lyrics and such to make a good CD booklet.
I've gotten all I need from the the mothersite except
any info at all about "Mates".  OF course I know it's
an AV demo and read what's in Song Stories but WHAT
are the lyrics!

I tried my ears out on it and this what I've got so

Mates of cards ???(cars?)
(Mates) --- of flats ???

(Mates)--- --- Laura Ashley??? ---
w-- t-- ---t???? (sounds like 'wipe the mat')
so--- ---- noses??? (sounds like 'saltine noses')
gonna find out???
Look who's jealous now
Look who's jealous now

But in a field at the school
Sunny jim scores the goal
Something clicks in daddy's skull
No longer jealous now
No longer jealous now

Can anyone else figure it out?  I really doubt it's
"Laura Ashley, wipe the mat saltine noses"

On another napster note, which ones of you guys out
there have those neato rarities!  I want pearl! I want
holding the baby! I want the Drunken Sessions!  Get
online pleeeeeeeeeease!  Share and enjoy!


Date: Thu, 22 Mar 2001 01:17:07 EST
Subject: Let's get Small (Town)!
Message-ID: <>

The Funkmeister queries....

>Smalltown - a clunker?

>Tom, is that you?....... Whatcha been smokin?


But I haven't been..... uh,......Wait a friggin' minnit....Yo!  So that's
what's missing!  Thanks for reminding me, Joe!  I wondered what happened!
Smalltown and Helicopter weren't always clunkers for me; now I know....When
the hell is this war on drugs gonna be over?  %-P !
>Have to agree with Chris on this tho - if you possibly can, get the first
and listen to them in order.

Dunks, that's a great idea!  Problem is, the order is Freak Out, Absolutely
Free (Verve release #V6-5013X), THEN We're Only In It For The Money (Verve
#V6-5045X).  BTW, We're Only In It For The Money is phase one of Lumpy Gravy,
while Lumpy Gravy is phase two of We're Only In It For The Money.  'ziffit

> And yes yes yes - get HOTS RATS which is almost everyone's favourite Zappa
>album, and please please get THE GRAND WAZOO which is its glorious sequel.

Uh, Grand Wazoo, which is the second of the two "Big Band" albums that Zappa
did in 1972, does not mention the name Hot Rats anywhere and is labeled a
Mothers album.  The Album I think you're referring to is Waka/Jawaka, the
second album of that group lineup, which features a picture of a sink with
Hot written on one spigot handle and Rats on the other.  Even though the
musicians are essentially the same, it's labeled as a Zappa record.  Go

No reccomendations from the Flo and Eddie period?
>Speaking of album openers, which XTC album starters really rawk yer werld?

I've always loved Wake Up kicking off TBE.  I also think that Summer's
Cauldron really sets the mood for Skylarking.

But then again, I do drugs and listen to Zappa..........%-)


"'Arf', she said."


Date: Thu, 22 Mar 2001 14:58:20 -0000
From: "Chris Clarke" <>
Subject: Remasters
Message-ID: <001701c0b2e0$ab941140$29a0a8c0@sigta>


Well I was going to post that had a list of all the remasters
with issue dates and prices (#7.99 except for Black Sea which was #11.99),
but when I went back today to check the date (21 or 28 of May, I couldn't
remember which) it had all changed, and now the new versions are listed with
'we can get this for you within 4-6 weeks' - except for Go2 which has a date
of  9/4/2001.

However you can preorder copies of the Japanese remasters of the first five
albums from them on import for #10.99 each (9/4/2001 release date) which
seems reasonable (Black Sea a pound cheaper!).

I am in no way affiliated etc....

In other news, Paul Culnane opined:

>Keen collectors can find all three known versions of MTIC on various
>bootlegs, but it's to be hoped that at least one version of the tune might
>show up the Virgin box set.

Yeah, at least there'll be no arguments about which is the worst song in the
collection ;-)

love you,

Chris Clarke

np: 'The Sophtware Slump' Grandaddy, 'Brazil OST' Michael Kamen & 'Va va
voom' Cinerama.
You must buy them all.


Date: Thu, 22 Mar 2001 15:35:17 -0000
From: Dewi Thompson <>
Subject: Deliver us from the elements - Consequences influence?
Message-ID: <>

Is there anyone else out there who is reminded of Godley and Creme's
Consequences when they hear "Deliver us from the elements"?  Both the
subject matter and the elemental keyboard sounds in the chorus.

Perhaps I'm just having a very slow day today.


ps I wish someone really would deliver us from the elements, I don't
think I've seen the sun in about 6 months.


Date: Thu, 22 Mar 2001 23:40:00 -0500
From: "Danny Phipps" <>
Subject: re: "homegrown"
Message-ID: <>

hi all...

according to the fine folks at, they're now
taking pre-orders for the "homegrown" cd which they say is
to be available on april 3rd!!  price -- $24.40 (import-only
for us americanos)

get those checkbooks out!!!!!


"All of the answers you seek can be
 found in the dreams that you dream..."
                      -- Dan Fogelberg


End of Chalkhills Digest #7-20

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