Precedence: bulk
Subject: Chalkhills Digest #6-224

         Chalkhills Digest, Volume 6, Number 224

                  Friday, 4 August 2000


                   Apple Venus Pie Trap
               Hanging out in Liverpool...
                 The Shaming of the Simon
                        I'll bite
                Your humble servant? Me??
                    RE: Benny's boobs
                    RE: KILL NAPSTER!
           I'll admit it: I'm a known XTCexual
                  In a Cartoon Graveyard
                     Bye Bye for Now
           Mo Jo Jo Jo and the Powerpuff girls
                   Weather and Weddings
                 Politics and Pirating...
                  No chain of office...
              Lots of language in our lungs


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Pink and wobbling with all their possessions.


Date: Thu, 3 Aug 2000 22:23:53 EDT
Subject: Apple Venus Pie Trap
Message-ID: <>


I once thought Neil Diamond's "Forever In Blue Jeans" was "Reverend Blue

I once thought the Hollies song "On a Carousel" was "I Own a Carousel."

My wife once thought the book Alice In Wonderland was the title and
the name of the main character....she heard it as Alison Wonderland.

My daughter...after hearing a radio advert for Chuck E Cheese's pizza
joint...informed me that she really wanted to go eat at Chuck E Jesus.
(how's that for a band name?)

Beatles great
Graceland good
Mr Easter has too much time on his hands
99.% of Rap bad (Ah, hell, it's all shit)
Harrison Sherwood funny
Vee Tube chain smokin' baby killer(he kills chain smokin' babies)
Graham Parker good
"she's got electric boobs, a mohair suit" You mean that's NOT right?
Paul Simon sole reason for the death of apertheid
Gary Numan knob twiddlin' idiot with one great song
AV1 better than AV2
Mark Strijbos ladykiller (dichotomy shmichotomy)
"rats paws"...the code has been broken

There is NOTHING in my message that can be debated because I said nothing
argumentative! (uh, that sounds a bit argumentative doesn't it? Sorry)

wes"I double dog dare you to"LONG


Date: Thu, 3 Aug 2000 22:54:10 EDT
Subject: Hanging out in Liverpool...
Message-ID: <>

I'm sure someone had already pointed out that Marty Willson-Piper name checks
Andy in one of his songs on his fine new album Hanging Out in Heaven (along
with Robert Wyatt).

 I'd also like to recommend picking up Kimberly Rew's CD (drawing a blank on
the title something to do with summer). Rew as you all know is a former Soft
Boy (Robyn Hitchcock's old band) and was one of the main songwriters in 2 hit
wonders Katrina & The Waves. Rew's CD is terrific. Smart pop for now people!
He also wrote the great tune Going Down to Liverpool.



Date: Thu, 3 Aug 2000 23:12:41 EDT
Subject: The Shaming of the Simon
Message-ID: <>


I really don't wish to belabor this subject.  I'm quite sure the "enough
already" flamethrowers are striking their matches, as they have with the rap
rap.  But I'm on fire right this second, and I have one more tidbit that I
feel is crucial to the discussion of Graceland and apartheid.  After this, I
will refrain from further discussion as much as possible, hopefully feeling
I've brought my point home.

In the enhanced CD release of Graceland, which I acquired last year, is a
somewhat lengthy but eye opening foward retrospective on the history of South
African Music and the events surrounding the making of Graceland by Timothy
White.  I highly recommend to anyone on either side of this debate to get a
hold of it and read it.  KNOW thy subject, as it were.  I will send a
photocopy to anyone who can't bring themselves to buy a copy of the CD (I
don't have a scanner or fax yet - I'm working on it!)  It's WAY too long to
reprint here, but I have a couple of selected quotes I wish to bring to your

>Graceland faced it's own troubled evolution from the moment Simon got off
the >plane in Johannesburg in February ' 85, with the United Nations
Committee >Against Apartheid threatening to censure him for allegedly
breaking the cultural >boycott of South Africa.  Simon was startled by this
reaction, having been a vocal >critic of apartheid and a supporter of the
boycott, even refusing repeated offers to >publicly perform during his visit.
 "This is a motion towards helping," he explained at >the time. It exposes a
culture, a people...I'm trying to be in a dialogue."

>Simon picked up key supporters in trumpeter Hugh Masekela and ledgendary
>singer-songwiriter Miriam Makeba, two self-exiled South Africans whose stern
>political stance against apartheid included vows not to return to their
homeland until >it was free.  "As far as the cultural boycott is concerned,"
Masekela told reporters, >"I am completely in favor of it when it stops
people playing in South Africa.  But >Paul Simon has brought the music of
South Africa to ten million ears - that's never >been managed before."

And a quote from none other than Peter Gabriel:
>"Prior to Graceland, the music of South Africa was largely unknown outside
the >country, except to a small minority of world music fans" notes fellow
singer->songwriter Peter Gabriel, who adds that Graceland was pathbreaking
artistically as >well as culturally.  "The music at its best brimmed with
life and emotion, and was >charged with a blend of spirituality and
sensuality.  With his elegant composition >and diffident obsevations, Paul
Simon fused these elements with his own >extraordinary songwriting skills.
He produced an irresistable and classic album, >which I have played many,
many times."

Of course, that's just his *opinion*.  Unless you wish to believe he suffered
a momentary lapse of taste.

>As Ray Phiri (guitarist) movingly recounts ......"Paul was the one who was
brave >enough to say, 'Listen, man, it's all about music at the end of the
day.  Let's have >fun!' "  In short, a person is a person because of other
people, however distant, who >arrive unexpectedly to help reaffirm humanity's
potential for compassion, growth and >self-renewal.


ObXTC - I'm sure the lads would agree.

Tom Kingston


Date: Thu, 3 Aug 2000 23:47:45 -0600
From: "Joseph Easter" <>
Subject: I'll bite
Message-ID: <001b01bffdd7$b52d3ce0$b1730a3f@default>

OK, I'll bite...

In regards to the gentle that asked what other artists' catalogues we occupy
in full:

Hank Williams
Otis Redding
Sam Cooke
XTC (like, duh...)
Keith Jarrett (solo, before the trio, not really my thang) (Also, not an
easy feat)
Johnny Cash

Complete Change of Pace now...

Beastie Boys
Nine Inch Nails
Depeche Mode
Chris Whitley
The The
Liz Phair
Kate's Bush

I am completely aware that I am a perfect sitting set-up, but while I know
what good music consists of, I also know what is fun, too. While I despise
the Shitneys and the usual pop, I recognize that some people are just
looking for mindless background music. I'm no different. Sometimes, XtC can
get in the way of conversation because it's just so chock full. This can be
a bad thing with a new friend. No offense, just an observation. But despite
my tastes and audiophilic nature, I can think of no substitute for XtC and
am constantly challenged in completing my collection. There always seems to
be something else. The horror! I don't know what I'd do if I ever got a copy
of Wrapped In Grey, I'd have nothing else to live for.........(gasp.) XtC
might be a collector's best friend.

Joseph "Angel's Pay" Easter

PS And may the sun never rise, on Blues Before Sunrise. I gotcha back,


Date: Fri, 04 Aug 2000 07:08:24 GMT
From: "Duncan Kimball" <>
Subject: Your humble servant? Me??
Message-ID: <>

My dearest Chalklings,

I can honestly say that I've never felt more at home than I do amongst
this ragged assortment of sarcastic, ill-tempered, judgemental,
opinionated misfits.

Seriously though ... a heartfelt "thank you" to Harrison, Annemarie, Paul,
and all the others (whose names I've shamefully forgotten) who have have
said such nice things about me and my writing in the last few days.

A special THANK YOU to our Fearless Leader, John Relph, for being kind
enough to give my Napster rant a place of honour on the Chalkhills site,
and for saying such generous things about it.

As a famous Australian boxer once said:

"I love youse all!"

Have a great weekend and thanks



Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 03:45:01 EDT
Message-ID: <>

ok, i'm new to this but not xtc. . .. there is a lot of extranious bs in
here, , , , what about the boys. . . people are losing focus. . .we are light
and stupidly happy. . . .remeber?  mikey!


Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 09:48:54 +0100
From: "Smith, David" <>
Subject: RE: Benny's boobs
Message-ID: <>

Hey Debs!

..."she's got electric boobs, a mohair suit.."

That's STILL what I hear! And I've always wondered what might
happen in the throes of passion with the lovely Benny.

Well, you know what happens when you lick a battery?

I'm really very sorry.

Smudge "Me ears are alight" boy


Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 08:58:06 +0100
From: "Marc Wickens" <>
Message-ID: <>

From: Radios In Motion <>
>I am 100% behind Napster, or any service that supports the free trading
>of music without having to pay $100 for some rare bootleg on eBay.
>Remember, I only stated what I am for.  There is NOTHING in my message
>that can be debated because I said nothing argumentative.  Its just my
>opinion, just as someones oppinion may be that its wrong to use Napster.
>I have paid my dues, and I buy any albums availble, but to tell me its
>wrong to download some rare, OOP tracks that some asshole is selling on a
>CDR on ebay for $100, is bullshit.

I was getting ready to write a massive flame when I saw the subject line,
but then saw the message body was quite the opposite!

I totally agree, I found a song I couldn't find on CD called "Seagulls are
Screaming kiss her kiss her" - Most music shops don't even go up to X
(unless the X-FILES release a soundtrack or something!) and Napster is a
great program, but yet again, the US justice system is getting in the way
of software companies instead of catching real criminals! Long live

Marc Wickens


Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 07:26:26 -0400
From: "Todd and Jennifer Bernhardt" <>
Subject: I'll admit it: I'm a known XTCexual
Message-ID: <>


Debora revealed:
>I'm choosing some XTC songs for these [vacation] tapes, and if you have
any suggestions I'd love to hear them!  Feel free to e-mail me directly.<
> These are the XTC albums I have:
> English Settlement
> Skylarking
> Oranges & Lemons
> Nonsuch
> WS
> AV1
> Drums and Wires
> UD Assortment

Okay. First suggestion: Buy the entire catalog. NOW. If you can't do it
all at once, first fill the Black Sea/Mummer/Big Express gap, then go for
White Music/Go2/Chips. Then we can talk tapes.

And, in #220, from:
>Marty "even though Todd Bernhardt apologized for his inadvertent use of
my nickname, I'm still using it just to rub it in" van Rappard<

See kids, you *can* make a difference on this list! I'm so proud.  ;^)


Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 05:20:39 -0700 (PDT)
From: Al LaCarte <>
Subject: In a Cartoon Graveyard
Message-ID: <>


Me: >>As if I'm somehow less qualified than
*you* to judge good music? Don't be silly.<<


>I did not say or even suggest that.  That's an
inappropriate response.<

As if I'm somehow less qualified than *you* to judge
what is an appropriate response?  Don't be silly.

>We are all our own best judges.

Agreed.  I'm not surprised at all that you judge
Graceland to be a fine record.

>My point was that I had spent countless
hours enjoying that album.<

Better you than me!

>I think it's thrilling and wonderful, and I find it
confounding that anyone would not enjoy it, let alone
hate it so much.  But, hey, that's your perogative,<

Good.  I was worried there for a minute.

> and I'm sorry you were offended.

Ah, not really.  Just having some fun.  Yanking your
chain. ;^)

I guess I was a bit amused at your original point (not
quoted) using the word "ignorance."  I heard the album
the first week it came out, and I listened to it 20 or
30 times.  I *wanted* to like it - Paul Simon is a
fine artist.  You loved it then, you love it now.  I
think it is mediocre at best.

> Just remember this; your declaring the album *crap*
is nothing more than *your opinion*.<

Of course, this is implicit when writing about art.
Does anyone not know this?

>It's not going to change the way those of us who love
it feel.<

Oh, man!  You mean I have been wasting my time?

>You have chosen not to listen, I feel. <

You are right, at least until I slide to hell on
Satan's sled, where I'm sure they'll be playing
"Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes" for eternity.



Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 14:26:03 +0100
From: "Chris" <>
Subject: Curtis
Message-ID: <000e01bffe17$a516c8e0$29a0a8c0@sigta>

In 6-222 Warren Butson wrote:

'An artist I love who has no connection to xtc is Curtis Mayfield. I think
he's extremely under-listened to, not under-rated as he's always being
praised by journalists, but very few people seem to know him beyond the
songs superfly and move on up. '

Just to say I completely agree and would urge anybody who hasn't experienced
Curtis' genius to search him out. In particular the track 'Nothing on me'
from the 'Superfly' album which is probably my No.1 good vibe song.

Also thanks to Marty 'Martin' van Rappard for the Swans information. I will
now try to search out a few of those albums.



Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 09:22:31 -0700 (PDT)
From: Molly <>
Subject: Bye Bye for Now
Message-ID: <>

I'm leaving too, because I'm getting a very negative
feeling about this group.  A person can't voice their
opinions without being flamed anymore in here.  I'm
going to unsubscribe for now, but I promise I'll be
back soon.  I just think a few people here should
learn to be less negative and stop flaming.  People's
opinions are people's opinions, and they have a right
to have them without being personally attacked.  And
also I think some people really like provoking people
by attacking their favorite bands/artists.
I've met a lot of great people in here, but a few have
left.  And John Relph, I think you're a great guy, I
just don't feel comfortable saying things in here
anymore.  Also, with my job, I don't have as much time
as I used to.  I'll be back someday.


AIM Name: MFanton00
eVoice Mailbox #: 88321880)


Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 12:20:12 EDT
Subject: Mo Jo Jo Jo and the Powerpuff girls
Message-ID: <>

> YEAH, baby! Okay, new-thread suggestion from yours truly:
>  What song did YOU pick in this situation? (And please don't be so
>  pathetic as to suggest that you didn't have a favorite "piss off the
>  parents/old folks" song.)

My choice would be anything on Plastic Ono Band by Lennon ( particularly
Working Class Hero or Mother) and Mott the Hopple's Brian Capers ( The Moon
Upstairs and Death May Be Your Santa Claus--Yikes my premature gray is
showing!). POB always reminded me of what Robert Johnson would be like if
he had played rock music--in fact it sounds like Lennon channels Robert
Johnson on much of this powerful album. I'm looking forward to the remaster
and hoping that it sounds better than the first issue (the tapes had aged
pretty badly so they'll probably have to use sonic solutions to
improve/clean them up). I know a lot of Stones fans slag the Beatles but
the Stones couldn't touch this album for its raw, bluesy intensity. They
came close. Once.

Never cared that much for the Sex Pistols (although I like a couple of
their singles) and always felt that Mott was more valid, intelligent and,
generally, better musicians/songwriters. Brain Capers always struck me as
the prototype punk album (it's frequently cited by former Clash men
Strummer and Jones as being a major influence on them).

Most overlooked band - Katrina & the Waves. God! Kimberly Rew could write
great songs!

Artists that peaked with their first release-
Thomas Dolby (although I quit like his second as well)
Katrina & the Waves (again, the second is about as good but doesn't improve
on the original model)
The Pretenders
John Lennon (same as above about Imagine --which is some respects is a better
album musically)
The Police (Sting became more ambitious but their first album represents
their best to me)
Tracey Chapman

Lots more but I don't want to bore you all.

>>When I first discovered Chalkhills, my favorite XTC album was Mummer. Most
>>folks on the list ranked it very poorly. We all have different tastes,

Actually, Mummer has grown on me. I think my initial reaction was based on
it being such a radical departure after English Settlement. The CD sounds
pretty good but Mummer is an album that could use a bit of sonic buffing
before being reissued.

On the sound issue--it appears to me that The Big Express was mastered from
the same one used to make the cassette. I could be mistaken about this but
it sounds like a cassette commited to CD.

Seems like Xtc would be a natural for the Powerpuff girls CD/show. Wonder
if TVT's approached them about the next album?



Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 11:13:33 -0400
From: MinerWerks <>
Subject: Weather and Weddings
Message-ID: <a04310101b5b0884c4ca8@[]>


>  >Almost as bad but w/o the negative physiological
>>effect is that horrid fusion shit they play during the
>>local forcast on the Weather Channel. Sends me running
>>for the mute button every time!
>I hate to disappoint some of you folks, but a lot it is Pat Metheny.
>Actually, because of that, I think it's improved a lot from a couple of
>years  ago when it was overloaded with EZ listening fusion.

Wonder if you guys would get a kick out of a little gag I made for a
project in college. My classmates always thought my humor weird,
maybe Chalkhills readers would get it. Anyway, I had to make a radio
commercial. So I recorded some "local forecast" music from The
Weather Channel and invented a one-minute pitch for "The Greatest
Hits Of The Weather Channel!" ... I constantly amuse myself thinking
back to that one... ("Who could forget Business Travelers Forecast,

and Rob Crawford wrote:

>  >Lady In Red - Chris De Burgh
>I second the motion that this song is absolute crap, and propose
>I just called to say I love you - Stevie Wonder
>The DJ at my wedding reception, the only stipulation regarding music played
>was that neither of the above where played.
>To back this up the DJ was told that if they where played he wouldn't be
>He played them, it took 3 hours for my wife to talk me into paying the so
>called DJ  after the reception.

Ugh! You poor, poor man! I feel your pain. This kind of thing is why
I *hate* ... let me stress that again - HATE - going to weddings. I
once agreed to DJ for a friend at his wedding (gratis, too), and I
personally felt I sucked. First off, I was only partially successful
at avoiding some of the "traditional" reception tunes, such as "YMCA"
and the "Chicken Dance." Luckily, I was not supplied with the latter,
however I did end up playing the former. Then there was the fact that
my pal is much more into the Christian music scene than I am, and he
requested I mix in some contemporary Christian tunes. Of course, I
had *no* idea what would fit in, because I knew none of the songs. Of
course I have to admire anyone who DJ's at weddings, because they
evidently have a special bond with wedding caterers and
photographers. I was very ill prepared to call the individual tables
to the buffet table, and I was unaware it was *my* responsibility to
shuffle the proceedings on in a timely manner to suit the
photographer's checklist of events... Do you know how creepy it is
for people to try to bribe you into calling their table number early
so they can get their food? Never again!

ObXTC: No wedding I have ever been to featured music by XTC. This
will probably hold true until the day I find someone who would be
willing to marry me.

= Derek "table number 23, you may get in line for the buffet now" Miner =


Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 22:19:17 +0900
From: "John Boudreau" <>
Subject: BD
Message-ID: <000001bffe26$ae73cbe0$705791d2@johnboud>

The Reverend wrote :

>Bob Dylan was a lyrical innovator - his work led to an insurgence of >real
>poetry into rock lyrics,

Agreed , but let's not forget who influenced Bob D ( and Jim M. ) , Allen
Ginsberg and Jack Kerouac .

>THAT is why Bob Dylan was so
> great.

He had a couple of good albums ...

>Also, his rock music of the mid-60s influenced a whole range of
>people from the Band to Tom Petty . . . So there.

I rest my case ...



Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 12:06:08 -0400
From: MinerWerks <>
Subject: Politics and Pirating...
Message-ID: <a04310103b5b091a08124@[]>

Jeff Eason writes:
>Hey, I'm no big fan of Al Gore, but George W. Bush is scary. The
>Republicans are attempting a Trojan Horse campaign of shutting up about
>their extreme views on free speach, abortion rights, the death penalty, and
>industrial polluters until they can get their boy in the Oval Office. Then
>watch out! George W. is an overgrown frat boy with a permanent smirk on his
>face from years of having his pappy bail him out of cocaine fiascos. There,
>I've said it. At least Al Gore fought in Viet Nam rather than have his
>father--who was at that time Governor of Tennessee--pull strings for him.

Did someone else bring up the Republican National Convention? I guess
we get into religious debates occasionally here - should we dip into
partisan politics? Personally, I'd much rather hear political talk
from the UK. I'm sick of George W. Bush and Al Gore. I consider
myself very moderate, but I have to work around some fairly
conservative people, the kind who complain about "liberal agendas." I
don't know if I distrust George W. Bush as much as Jeff does, but I
certainly have no love for Al Gore. I think the best option for
myself would be to vote for Ralph Nader. And don't give me none of
that "throwing away your vote" crap. At least I'll be able to live
with myself no matter who wins.

By the way, I'm not looking to take any sides on liberals vs.
conservatives, etc. And I hope that nobody will take a lesser view of
me because of the above political commentary - I strive to get along
with *everybody,* no matter what their political affiliation or


and Kevin Diamond wrote:

>*Cries* I lost my old e-mail accounyt, and somehow was unable to find any
>trace of any of the e-mails Derek Miner sent me! So I couldn't send any
>money for the disc. Is it to late, oh wonderful Miner, to get a copy?

I will try to re-send the info to your current address Kevin.

>  >Now will somebody please give Derek "The Bull With the Golden Guts" or
>>whatever it's called, and hope that he is motivated by all this praise to
>>give that one the MinerWerks treatement, too!
>Well.... I *do* happen to have a copy of Bull... so what do you say, Derek?
>In return for putting this request in so late, a CD-R of Bull that you may
>or may not give out to other people?

Psstt....I'll let you all in on a secret... I already have a pristine
first generation copy of the Bull... it's just a matter of time! In
the meantime, please feel free to email ( me
suggestions for "B-sides" a la the "Jules Verne" disc.

I kinda wanted to keep another idea I had under wraps, but I really
need input to really do this up right. I want to hear from people who
could contribute material relating to the 1989 acoustic radio tour. I
have some of the shows on tape already, but there's a lot I don't
have. But, most importantly, I'm looking for other material (ie.
outside of the broadcast radio appearances) from this period. I mean
print articles realating to XTC in the US at the time, photos from
the road (especially if they're in the radio station), in-store
appearance photos and commentaries, video tapes of anything from XTC
in the US at the time, etc... If I can pull off what I've got
floating in my head, I think it will be really special.

= Derek =


Date: Fri, 4 Aug 2000 08:26:07 -0700
From: Marc Demarest <>
Subject: No chain of office...
Message-ID: <>

I'm late, posting for the first time, filled with trepidation...

For years, listening to *Mayor*, I was certain the line toward the end was:

"Don't change your focus in the hope of getting one"

so certain in fact that I posted the epigram outside my cubelet-shaped
cell at my place of employment....attributed to XTC...only to have
another closet XTCer drop by one day and ask:

Which XTC song is that?

When I replied "MoS", she said: no chain of office and no hope of getting


Marc Demarest
DecisionPoint Applications

The more the requirements of consumption come to supercede the requirements
of production, the more government by constraint gives way to government by
seduction.  -- Raoul Vaneigem


Date: 4 Aug 2000 15:21:00 +0100
From: "Robert Wood" <>
Subject: Lots of language in our lungs
Message-ID: <>
Organization: Mutech Ltd

Dave wrote:

>> chalkhillers? WHY have most of you stopped talking about the worlds
finest,XTC? <snip>

we true fans dont want to know about subscribers with BAs in canadian
diddly shit,we like to hear views of XTC,get to bed or give us
something interesting. <<

Oh, how very eloquent and enlightening, Dave. I'm obviously not a true
fan, I didn't realise 'til you opened my eyes. All this time I've been
enjoying the talk of rap, Napster, Morrison etc and I didn't
understand how that made me a lesser fan. I bow down to beg for
forgiveness and promise that in future I will only read e-mails that
focus on XTC.


PS Do you *know* what the page down key is, Dave? Or would that be too
open minded to mention something that was nothing to do with XTC?


End of Chalkhills Digest #6-224

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