Precedence: bulk
Subject: Chalkhills Digest #6-186

         Chalkhills Digest, Volume 6, Number 186

                   Friday, 14 July 2000


         Hi, my name is ____ and I'm a popaholic
                     Re: Banned Names
                Re: THE MAYOR OF SIMPLETON
                      slight return
                  A Tale Of Twin Cities
                   Stupidly stupid idea
         Every band has someone who loves them...
           People don't die of fright do they?
                   wear your rubbers...
                   Re: recommending Roy
                     Band names. . ..
                 Re: musical necrophilia
    I'd Like To Teach The World To Sing Stupidly Happy
                     Turning Japanese
                       XTC sighting
                        Swoon City
                  I second that demotion
                     the list.......
            Belinda Blanchard Builds A Bridge
                        stuff this
                Thank Goodness For VCRs :)


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Doesn't realise she's on the production line.


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 09:52:05 -0700 (PDT)
From: brown <>
Subject: Hi, my name is ____ and I'm a popaholic
Message-ID: <>

Seth asks-
<<Everyone seems to have calmed down a bit over the new release. Do
you think we'll start getting some sober reviews now?...>>

Sober?  Good grief, Seth!.. I don't know about you all, but I'm still knee
deep in a summer-long bender here!... I'm sort of a lightweight when it
comes to potent pop.. a couple of solid shots and I'm gone, daddy, gone..
"like a slug of rye on an empty stomach".. it takes me a while to come

Funny that you mentioned intoxication, Seth..  I was just thinking that if
'You And The Clouds Will Still Be Beautiful' was a drink, it'd be a tall
one.. possibly with two kinds of rum.. and definitely with a brightly
colored paper umbrella stuck in it..

Not sharing my vision?  o.k., look on the back of the liner notes.. right
THERE it says-

* written by Andrew John Partridge, mixologist and 'cabana boy
* extraordinaire' *

...Now everybody samba!

Carrying a monster-sized twitch for XTC,

Debora Brown

- These days I'm always high below the ground, thanks to Mr. Limpet! - a
big wet kiss (or the fish equivalent) to you, Phineas - I imagine that the
fish equivalent would be wet, wouldn't it? -


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 11:17:00 -0600
Subject: Re: Banned Names
Message-ID: <>

Rory Wilsher says, "Hey,great name for a band tho', "The The". I just
thought of that. Dang, did someone beat me to it?)"

Duh !

Matt Johnson and The The have put out some GREAT records, particularly
"Mind Bomb," with ex-Smiths guitar whiz Johnny Marr playing some amazing
riffs and Johnson's lyrics being particularly strong. Sinead O'Connor
actually hits a high point with her added vocal on "Kingdom of Rain." A
strong dose, but worth taking.

And as for band names, I like "Shaved Belafonte," but that's just

XTC content? Um,

"I'm always saying what I'm gonna do..."




Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 13:53:54 EDT
Message-ID: <>

In a message dated 13/07/00 17:19:58 GMT Daylight Time,
 "Brian Young" <> writes:-
 I recently purchased Mike Keneally's 1992 album Hat (for $2.95 at
 Rasputin's, a SF Bay area treasure trove), and in addition to the expected
 fine guitar work and clever songs (Eno and the Actor, for one), there was a
 credit saying

 "This recording embodies a portion of the composition THE MAYOR OF SIMPLETON
 written by Andy Partridge, published by EMI Virgin Music Ltd."

 Does anyone know what song uses the portion of TMOS? <snip>

I would guess that if you listen to the LP and find a song with a passage
that sounds like MOS that would be it....?

Jamie :)


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 10:44:10 -0700
From: Natalie Jacobs <>
Subject: slight return
Message-ID: <C1463800B2EFD311A84B00A0C9E9318B2D401C@NT1>


Still smells the same in here.  Hmm.  Um, hello.  A few of you might vaguely
remember me as the perpetrator of the long-defunct Perdix website.  Or you
might remember me as... well, I didn't do anything else memorable on this
list, but you might remember me anyway.

I've returned to tell you that I've written a long review of "Wasp Star,"
which some of you might be interested in.  It's located at    Also, you might possibly enjoy a
review of "Apple Venus Vol. 1" which I wrote last year and is located at  Comments are, of course, welcome.  And
if anyone wants a gushy, breathless account of how I kissed and was kissed
by Andy Partridge, please e-mail me privately.  :)

Apologies for the self-promotion.  I hope I won't be smited/smote/smitten by
Mr. Relph too severely.

back to lurkdom,


p.s.  Hello to Eb, James, John, Steve, et al.  :P


Date: 13 Jul 00 12:46:37 CDT
From: C C Baxter <>
Subject: A Tale Of Twin Cities
Message-ID: <>

>P.S. Just out of curiousity, are there any other Twin Cities chalkhillers
>out there?

Yes.  I live in one of the twin cities (I often forget which one they look
so similar).
Another first time poster,
Todd J


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 22:36:31 +0300 (EET)
From: Jani Sallinen <>
Subject: Stupidly stupid idea
Message-ID: <>

Howdy all.

I'm a loooong-time lurker and first-time poster(boy) so be gentle...

The other night I was trying to get some sleep to the sound of mighty
Stupidly Happy (thought it would work like counting sheep but the actual
effect is that of caffeine) and a thought came to my mind. It doesn't
happen that often so I'm forced to think I might be onto something. As
most of you already know, Stupidly Happy is quite an irresistible song.
Once The Riff starts its rockin' and its rollin' you cannot help but move
your various limbs in an orderly fashion.

So, as I was fiddling with my air-guitar (emphasis on the word air, the
brown-one was firmly in its case) I not only came to the conclusion that
this must be the next single but also realized that I had the ingredients
for the impending video in my very hands (so to speak). The video would
cost next to nothing, it would share the characteristics of the song and
everybody could participate.

The idea is stupidly simple, really: air-guitar-vaganza! Grab your video
camera, put it on a stand, press REC, assume the position and let it rip!
I'm pretty sure there must be quite a few decent air-guitar players among
us who could show the world that XTC is the real reason tennis rackets
were made. What the hell, if you're too coy, go on and lure your kid to do
some of that magic instead of you. And Andy could do a cameo. Some
enterprising soul could edit the whole thing together and the end result
would undoubtedly be cheap, charming, and heart-warming in a
Spike-Jonze-kind-of-way. So whaddya think?

	-Jani from the Arctic Circle


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 15:53:52 EDT
Subject: Every band has someone who loves them...
Message-ID: <>

> >On the other
>  hand, I played English Settlement for one of my
>  brothers and he commented
>  on the "off key dreck" we were listening to. Then
>  again, he thinks Jeff
>  Lynne should have replaced John Lennon in the Beatles
>  <

Play him some Journey.


He likes Journey. Here's the irony--he loves the Beatles, Stones, Who
(so-so on the Kinks) and Dylan. Yet Andy's singing was too much for
him. Go figure.  My other brother, on the other hand, loves everything Xtc
does--well except Apple Venus Volume One. He's a guitar player and wants
to hear guitars. He does have great taste even if he also likes Journey. I
can forgive him, though since Neal Schon is a pretty darn good guitar

Xtc content:
Kfog has been playing ITMWML and other tracks quite a bit. Unfortunately,
I've noticed once the album is no longer "new" they quietly go back to
their Rolling Stones/Steve Miller corner. Don't get me wrong, they do play
some pretty nifty stuff. Unfortunately, I've heard it a million times

Re: Ed's comments about STINYC and Lennon--Lennon does play some mean
guitar on Yoko's albums. He does so as well on Sometime. I've always liked
the raw emotion of his playing. It's not technically good, but it captures
the emotional moment. Rory Gallagher is very much the same. The guy could
write great blues tunes, play a mean blues guitar (and, yes, I think he
could blow Clapton off the stage if he were around. The only person able
to write and perform as well is Peter Green) and sing live he lived
it. Which, in some respects, he did.

Any word on demos from WS and/or How ...Came to be discs coming out?



Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 15:58:15 EDT
Subject: People don't die of fright do they?
Message-ID: <>

Got to agree with Belinda

> Dunks - 10CC were 1st rate musicians and wordsmiths and their
>  "Original Soundtrack" was my Sgt Pepper.  They prepared me for what
>  was to come with the beauty and wit of XTC.

Break out the steak knives! Actually, I think that Dunks was probably
referring to the later line up without Godley & Creme. There were a couple of
lame albums that cropped up in the 10cc canon. 10 out of 10 is quite good
however (as is Deceptive Bends--if a tad too "light" lyrically).



Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 13:10:28 -0700 (PDT)
From: Tyler Hewitt <>
Subject: wear your rubbers...
Message-ID: <>

Dan DuBray wrote:
I feel like ****ing Casey Kasem

Play safe-it wasn't that long ago that Casey Kasem
fucked over Negativland...


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 18:09:41 EDT
Subject: Re: recommending Roy
Message-ID: <>

In a message dated 7/13/00 12:41:50 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
<> writes:

<< So... which Wizzard albums are
 worth checking out? >>

There's a Roy Wood solo album from 1976 called Mustard that is an absolute
pure-pop orgasm.  It was recently released on CD (in England) with a bunch of
bonus tracks, including some Wizzard stuff, and interesting liner notes.  I
bought mine at Tower in Philly, so it can't be too hard to find stateside.

Oh, by the way - hello, been lurking the past few days.  Nice to be here!



Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 18:14:59 EDT
Subject: Band names. . ..
Message-ID: <>

In a message dated 7/13/00 11:41:50 AM US Eastern Standard Time,
<> writes:

> >My band is/was named Two Sheds..but I found out there
>  already is a TWO SHEDS in Sweden!!! <
>  And then he posed:
>  >Any one else got any ideas for me?<
>  How about "Joe Funk?"

Band names I almost used:
Urethera Franklin

I currenly am in the process of using Chester's Drawers. (Also, the Grinning
Scarecrow Rock Band).   My first band was called the Bastards - it was going
to be a punk band featuring violin, trumpet, snare drum, and bass guitar.  It
never went anywhere.  This was years before I heard "Transistor Blast" and
its reference to "The Blues Bastards."  Damn Andy Partridge, telepathically
stealing my ideas!


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 18:12:52 EDT
Subject: Re: musical necrophilia
Message-ID: <>

In a message dated 7/13/00 11:41:50 AM US Eastern Standard Time,
someone writes:

> Kenny
>  G. releasing his "lame-ass, jive, pseudo   bluesy,
>  out-of-tune, noodling, wimped out, fucked up playing
>  all over" one of Louis Armstrong's tracks!!!!!!

Hah!  You HAVE read the Pat Metheny rant about Kenny G's "musical
necrophilia," haven't you?  Oh, it's beautiful!

- - -
Reverend Jody L. Barnes
"May the baby Jesus shut your mouth and open your mind." - Don Vliet
"He who hesitates is lost." - Andy Partridge


Date: Fri, 14 Jul 2000 00:33:03 +0200
From: "Mark Strijbos" <>
Subject: I'd Like To Teach The World To Sing Stupidly Happy
Message-ID: <>

Dear Chalkers,

>From the depths of lurker-dom Jennifer Geese asked:

> p.s.  Mark - is it not true that your seeming obsession with XTC is a
> cover up for an evil plan to take over the universe by brainwashing us
> with the music we've grown to love?
of course...
But don't worry, i see myself as an enlightened dictator. only one
rule applies in my empire: do what you want, but harm none.
Those who digress will be put out of our misery

yours uber alles,

Mark R. Strijbos,
Central HQ


Date: Fri, 14 Jul 2000 00:33:02 +0200
From: "Mark Strijbos" <>
Subject: Turning Japanese
Message-ID: <>

Dear Chalkers,

> Anyone still looking for a copy of XTC-Song Stories...
...In Japanese?

don't know if this has already nbeen mentioned here...
Out now, hot off the press: the Japanese language edition of Song
Stories. ISBN # 4-89176-422-8 @ 3500 Yen (approx. 35 U$?) As you
may know, you can order any book from anywhere in the world at
your local bookstore using that number.

Thanks to a very kind donation - domo origato, nishimatu! -
i can reveal that it is really a very beautiful production.
Hard-bound cover, nice paper, excellent printwork, gorgeous
typography (and calligraphy of course!) and overall design quality.

Just discovered while typing this message that it is translated by
the very honourable and extremely knowledgeable Shigemasa
Fujimoto, author of the XTC collectors bible, the Wonderland
discography and "Fossil Fuel", the Japanese guide to all the XTC
singles. Hats off, my friend... really very well done.

And it looks smashing next to my Japanese Chalkhills And Children

yours in xtc,

Mark S. @ the Little Lighthouse


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 18:27:26 -0400
From: "Brian" <>
Subject: XTC sighting
Message-ID: <005b01bfed19$86cfe4c0$94e49cd1@Brian>


XTC sighting:
The latest issue of MAXIM Magazine has a full-page TVT Records ad for 'Wasp
Star' (hear! hear!).
The issue I speak of has the three lovely ladies from the 'X-MEN' movie on
the cover.

-Brian Matthews


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 19:52:38 EDT
Subject: Swoon City
Message-ID: <>

Dahling Chalkers - This was a first for me: seeing a live, moving, Andy. I
don't smoke, and I crave a cigarette! Ahh!!! Maturity is SO COOL!!! (I'd
better believe that at 44.) D-r-e-a-m-y.

I've packed my bags, left a note to husband of 19 years, and booked a ticket
for Swindon :-)  Dear Husband wishes Dear Andy patience, patience, patience.
Dear Husband is convinced I've returned to age 16. I don't think I ever
really left, thank you verrrryyy much. Well, I can dream, can't I?

Those three mouthy talentless twits couldn't hold a candle to The Man. I had
never heard of any of them ....

Returning to Skylarking and a glass of port...

girls just wanna have fu-un.


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 16:53:57 -0700
From: Ed Kedzierski <>
Subject: I second that demotion
Message-ID: <>

In 6-183, Joe Easter said:
		On a heavier note, I can't believe noone has listed the band
Chicago as a worst of. They easily hold the record (pun?) as far as the
quantity of releases, and with each new evolution, they progressively get
worse.  Quantity over quality, oui? They should have named themselves
Wisconsin.  (Insert Cheesey pun here, thank you.) I don't think anyone
else's suggestion can hold any merit whatsoever when taking into
consideration this smooth rock crap.I would rather get kicked in the stomach
for a fortnight by Ringo Starr and a babbling Sir Paul than listen to a
track off any of Chicago's fledgling albums. And that goes for Peter "Karate
Kid" Cetera, too. Can I get an Amen?

Indeed you can! A-f**cking-men! Bleh. Beyond the "just come up with a proper
goddamn album title already" thing, this band just personifies so many
things that I dislike... I won't say that I've never derived any enjoyment
at all from them, but it's all been mocking (you know, like the way people
always sing "Does Anybody Really Know What Time it Is?" in a cheesy crooner
voice when someone asks the time, etc.), never on the level of "Oh, this is
really good, I sincerely enjoy it". Cetera... that godawful voice... fun to
do an impression of sometimes, though, especially if one' own singing voice
(like my own) is terrible, resulting in an unspeakable screeching
distortion, which is exactly what he deserves (And the look on some people's
faces if you belt out the falsetto "ooooo, no, baby please don't go" from
"If You Leave Me Now" for no apparent reason can be truly priceless... And
speaking of "If You Leave Me Now", doesn't that one acoustic guitar bit
sound like it belongs in a coffee commercial?). That twit Mitch Miller
earned my eternal enmity when he used to slag the Beatles and praise these
As always, I'm sure the inevitable defence is forthcoming from someone...

And the whole "F**king Casey Kasem" threadlet just forces me to imagine the
sound of his voice saying (imagine I'm doing an amazingly perfect Kasem
Oh yeah. Give it to me: give it to me good.

Eeeewww!, eh?

XTC content:
Found a sealed copy of the "Limited" version of Fossil Fuel (embossed/molded
cover) at a cheaper price than most places are charging for the "regular"
version, so I changed my mind (wasn't going to bother with FF as I have all
the tracks) and picked it up.

Just a casual thing,
Ed K.


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 16:46:53 -0700 (PDT)
From: Tyler Hewitt <>
Subject: the list.......
Message-ID: <>

Well, I just finished watching Andy on VH1's the list.
This has been building for half an hour now, so bear
with me..

That show is the most worthless annoying piece of SHIT
I've seen in a very long time! I swear to god my IQ
dropped by 10 points while watching it.  I know that
VH1 and MTV are not paragons of quality programming,
but MY GOD!

whew. I feel better now.

Andy was actually pretty decent on it, considering. I
don't understand why he was paired up with a bunch of
stupid, vapid brats half his age, however. Had the
other guests been people closer to Andy's age, it
might have been more fun. Instead, you had these
clueless kids sitting around looking like they were
wondering who let grandpa into the studio.

I agreed with Andy's choices, in fact had thought of
two of them myself when pondering the subject of most
overplayed song. Also liked Andy's Hitleresque
goosestep to Rock & Roll Pt.1.

But overall, I feel like I've wasted 1/2 hour of my
life that I can never get back again. Just think-I
could have been watching a Simpsons rerun for the
193rd time!



Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 18:22:30 PDT
From: "Duncan Kimball" <>
Subject: Belinda Blanchard Builds A Bridge
Message-ID: <>

Happy Bastille Day, my Chalky chums! I eat a criossant in honour of the
glorious revolution.

To business ...

With heroic effort, Belinda has single-handedly spanned the Trans-Atlantic
Irony Gap -- and proven me conclusively wrong about  Americans being the
only people who don't get this kind of humour.

>Dunks - 10CC were 1st rate musicians and wordsmiths and their
>"Original Soundtrack" was my Sgt Pepper. They prepared me for what
>was to come with the beauty and wit of XTC.

No shit, Sherlock?

>Please tell me how you would wish me to kill you. I assume you would >like
>me to crucify you

Too late - I am already wriggling grotesquely in my death throes, fatally
impaled  on the sharp end of your rapier wit.

Cor lumme, guv'nor - I'm done for! Blimey! :p

In other news ... thanks, Ed K. for your eloquent elaboration on my points
about Disney and American crap culture. Well said. Actually, I thought the
use of the word "pabulum" was quite appropriate in the context. Sorry if I
freaked y'all out, Matt. I tend to forget that some folks gets scared by
them big words.

(no....*grunt* ... no! ... MUST resist urge ... must not resort to ...*gasp*
... trailer park jokes...)

Joe Easter - I (almost) totally concur re: Chicago. Excremental, on the
whole - although the first couple of singles are pretty good, and they,
along with BST, were quite influential in creating that particular sound.
But yeah, it was all down hill when Cetera joined. Just the worst kind of
MOR schlock you could imagine really. Oh, except for the horrific musical
car wreck that was Starship. *shudder*

XTC content: What is the next single? It MUST be "Stupidly Happy" (except in
Australia, where Triple J have already given it a hiding.) I continue to
prosecute the case that "We're All Light" should be given a William
Orbit-type dance remix and then be unleashed to go hog-wild on the dance
charts. Non?



Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 18:52:01 -0700 (PDT)
From: brown <>
Subject: stuff this
Message-ID: <>

I don't know why I'm bothering with this, but I fear Eb has misconstrued my
innocent little post.

This was my original posting-
---..If you visit VH1's website, you can cruise over to the ballot for Andy's
>'List' episode (#349).. Any-who, you can vote for the most overplayed song,
>and if I remember correctly, Andy suggested Sinatra's, 'My Way'. (Right, Mr.
>Keel?)  I really wanted to click on 'Stairway To Heaven' as my first choice,
>but I decided to concur with Herr Partridge..---

Eb said-
<<There isn't *really* anyone who will be upset if Andy's "overplayed" choice
doesn't win the ballot...uhh, *is* there? Especially, anyone upset enough
to consider "cheating" in Partridge's favor? Good grief.>>

I can't help but think you are referring to me, Eb.

This is what I said-
--I really wanted to click on 'Stairway To Heaven' as my first choice,
but I decided to concur with Herr Partridge..--

Dear tightly-wound Eb, perhaps I should have worded it differently, but what
I meant was that I decided to vote for My Way because I(me, myself) thought
it was the most overplayed song of the choices offered.  (and Stairway To
Heaven is STILL my second choice, the MC Hammer song is my third)..
Apparently being in agreement with Andy has aroused suspicion.

Oh, maybe it was the subject line of the post: stuff the ballot box.  Did
that ruffle your feathers, Eb?  My pet, it was not meant to be taken
LITERALLY.. sheesh..

You finished with this-
<<anyone upset enough to consider "cheating" in Partridge's favor? Good grief.>>

Upset?  Cheating?  What post were you reading?  You lost me, sugar..

I do hope that some of you did go and 'give it a whirl', just for shits and

Hope this clears things up, Eb.

Debora Brown


Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 19:19:02 -0700 (PDT)
From: Molly Fanton <>
Subject: Thank Goodness For VCRs :)
Message-ID: <>

Well, tonight's the night that Andy's on VH1's The
List.  I watched a little of it at the 7pm EST one,
but I had to go eat dinner.  I missed the ending, but
I decided to tape the 11pm EST one.
I was really giddy when I saw the first part, I won't
give it away until I see the full show.  But when the
obnoxious host (can't recall his name) announced
Andy's name, I squealed with delight.  Man, I can't
wait to see the full show.  I hope I set the timer
correctly on my parents' VCR. :)


AIM Name: MFanton00
Fave Quote: "If your flight is going rough, your soul will lead you to
the nearest exit" - Jump - XTC (A. Partridge)


End of Chalkhills Digest #6-186

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