Precedence: bulk
Subject: Chalkhills Digest #5-31

          Chalkhills Digest, Volume 5, Number 31

                Thursday, 3 December 1998

Today's Topics:

                       John Thomas
             Chalkhills Digest One Two Three
                  Re: White Music Sucks!
                       NME my ENEMY
      XTC CD-Rs to trade (will also trade for tapes)
                  Bambi's Greatest Hits
                   Re: Old People Only
Choclate Synthesizer and Super Roots and Uoredoms and Eedoms and so forth
Re:'s (hey... that would be a great band name: "The Re:'s")
                Love Stratosphearic Dukes
                 A Round of Lime Rickeys!
                 Shameless Self-Promotion
                      Phil too? [1]
            Re: A Collideascope of Corninessv
                   Re: Pooey Old Grump
                  Mummer vs. Settlement
                    fun, fun, funding
                         top pics
                     Re: Chunky Stew


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I say it really doesn't matter where I put my finger.


Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 2 Dec 1998 06:17:01 EST
Subject: John Thomas

>Mostly, I looked blankly into their eyes (I am soooo good at that).
>Anyway... anyway.  They'd always inform me that a penis was referred
>to as a John Thomas in one of the Monty Python videos that was popular
>at the time.  You'd think, once, a person could have left it at
>"did you know your boyfriend is a penis".  I'd find that more humorous
>without the explanation.  In all the Monty Python I've seen, I've never
>heard it referred to as a J.T.? Has anyone? and... why? why?
>and... where did "jack-off" come from?

  You apparently haven't seen The Meaning Of Life, that's what it's from;
the "Every Sperm Is Sacred" routine. After the parade of Catholic
schoolchildren singing "Every sperm is sacred/Every sperm is great/If a
sperm gets wasted/God gets quite irate" they cut to a Protestant man
explaining to his wife "I'm Protestant and that means I can wear anything on
my John Thomas I want to!" in the process of pointing out the difference
between the likes of him and the Catholic riffraff out there on the
street. To which his wife wonders out loud "When's the last time we had
sex?" and he replies "Sex? What's that?" That's how I remember it, anyway;
it's the only Python movie I haven't seen more than a couple of times. It's
somewhat darker and angrier than their early work, even a little disturbing
in places.



Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 2 Dec 1998 06:17:13 EST
Subject: Chalkhills Digest One Two Three

>1. I'm astounded ... there are actually people who *don't* like Oranges
>& Lemons???? Inconceivable!! I must admit I hadn't really thought about
>the "sheeny" production aspect, other than presuming it was part of the
>whole quasi-psychedelic tone of the album ... like having a great
>psychedelic record with GOOD production, instead of we usually got from
>that era, with everything compressed to within a semi-tone of its life.
>Hmmmm. Now THIS may be heresy, but I personally feel that it was the
>first album after English Settlement that manages to achieve the sort of
>atmosphere and energy they had around the Black Sea/E.S. period. I love
>all the albums in between, but they are somehow ... quieter. O&L is
>definitely one of my XTC Top 5 ...

  I'm a bit late getting in on this unfortunately; couldn't get into AOL for
a few days due to a software problem with my recently installed OS
8.5. It'll all be detailed in my review which I'll be writing of it, which
will be less than complimentary(I do software reviews as a
sideline). Anyhoo...O&L is far from my favorite XTC album, I do have some
problems with the "sheeny" production, but most of the songs are quite
solid; the only real clunker on the album in my book is "Here Comes
President Kill Again." On the other hand, only "Pink Thing" would rank among
my 20 favorite XTC songs, though "Miniature Sun" and "Chalkhills and
Children" would definitely be runnerups. The production does ruin several
potentially great songs for me though, especially Colin's material; it makes
him sound like Tears For Fears, especially "King For A Day." O&L IS graced
by the best drummer XTC ever had, though, Pat Marsellotto. Though he's a
little too busy on "Garden Of Earthly Delights," for example, his playing is
awesome on "Miniature Sun," to name one. Terry Chambers would never do
anything like that.

>2. Re: "wanker" and the trans-Atlantic slanguage gap: I remember being
>mightily amused when I first disovered "Married With Children", where
>Peg Bundy's maiden name was Peggy Wanker. We howled with laughter - the
>American audience was silent. Wanker is largely meaningless in the U.S.
>unless you know British or Australian humour. It's a very venerable term
>here in the Antipodes, having a charmingly propulsive quality, when
>spoken aloud, that only our wide brown accent can impart. Especially
>effective when chanted loudly by large groups of intoxicated young
>cricket hoons.

  It's familiar to Canadians too, though not a part of their usual
vocabulary(the Quebecois especially have epithets far more colorful, though,
I can assure you). I'm wondering if Peggy Wanker's related to the Wankers of
Bulgaria, a mythical comedy family who emigrated to Canada and whose travels
across the company were documented in a song cycle released on an album
recorded sometime in the mid-80's and supposedly shown on TV in some
form(Martin Short supposedly plays several roles in it, though I never saw
or heard of it aside from the album). The most interesting thing about the
album is the liner notes, which are more hilarious than anything that was
recorded therein; seven or eight well-produced but ordinary mid-80's pop
period pieces Phil Collins would be proud of. The sole exception is a
somewhat amusing a capella piece by guests The Nylons with "We Have Your
Daughter," in which daughter Wankette is kidnapped by thugs who find her so
obnoxious that they offer to pay Ignatz Wanker to take her back. I gave that
album to my brother for Christmas in '86, I believe, and since then I have
yet to meet a single person in Canada, let alone anywhere else, who's even
heard of this album. You believe me, don't you? Don't you? :-)

>4. I heartily concur with Markus about the Shatner record. I challenge
>anyone to listen to his version of "Lucy In The Sky" without needing
>Inconti-pants. Howlingly, devastatingly funny. I first heard it here in
>Sydney when a local station ran an "Indefensible Song Competition"
>(things like "Psycho", "Wives and Lovers" - you get the drift). I have
>still never heard anything quite like it. A remarkable document of a man
>being a TOTAL wanker.

  Be very afraid; William Shatner is releasing ANOTHER single. I don't
remember what it is exactly, but I saw it mentioned on a website I stumbled
across that I forgot to bookmark. If I run across it, I'll warn you all.



Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 2 Dec 1998 06:17:22 EST
Subject: Re: White Music Sucks!

>Molly sez:
>"Am I the only person who doesn't hate any of the XTC albums, except for
>White Music"

>Nope! I LOVE every single XTC album in my possession! (Now, the only 2 I
>have yet to purchase are O&L and Nonsvch.) Now, I don't really hate White
>Music wither, but there really are only 5 or 6 songs on the whole thing
>that I really like.

>"Oh, but what about Go2?", you may be thinking. well, get ready to flame
>me....Go2 is one of my FAVORITE albums!

>"Oh, but Go2 sucked! You suck!"  you may be thinking. But if so, let it
>be. Go2 just happens to be a really fun album!  My friend (who shall
>remain nameless), will defend me if she is around! I haven't heard from
>her since she told me she was going to the MD XTC gathering. Where are
>you?? Defend me!!!!!

  I still don't like White Music, but only because I didn't like it when I
heard it on a friend's stereo in the early '80's. I remember liking "Statue
Of Liberty" and "This Is Pop," and that's about it. I HATED the cover of
"All Along The Watchtower." I do have the 3-D EP, though, which I hear is
included on the CD version of White Music, and I quite enjoy that; the
closest thing to punk they've done. Not their best compared to what was to
come, but worth a spin now and again. I will come to your defense on GO 2,
though; the only song I dislike is "My Weapon," and that's only if I think
about it. If I let it fade into the background it's not unpleasant
musically, though I must admit Barry's voice is as creepy as people tell me
mine is. Otherwise, it's musically more cohesive than White Music, and
starts out great; "Mecchanik Dancing," "Battery Brides" and "Crowded Room"
are all on my list of candidates for Best of XTC tapes for the uninitiated,
though if I have to pick only one so more worthy later material doesn't get
shorted(I prefer Nonsuch to both O&L and Skylarking myself)"Mecchanik
Dancing" gets the nod. The rest isn't bad but doesn't really leap out and
tickle me like XTC's best stuff does(or messes with my mind in some more
subtle way, like "Runaway" or "Love On A FArmboy's Wages." I think the GO2
cover, though, is possibly THE most brilliant album cover ever released,
though. Who could top that? The poster from it also graced my dorm room wall
in college for the better part of four years as well.



Message-Id: <199812021133.LAA07797@uks447>
Date: 02 Dec 98 11:01:54 +0000
Subject: NME my ENEMY

Dom, you're right about NME.  Last time I read it, they were slagging Julian
Cope off.  They're completely insane.  I didn't buy it, mind, I found it in
a bin somewhere.

But even worse is Time Out.  God knows what they'll say about "Apple Venus".

I'm dreading it.

If you don't get either of these pathetic publications in the States, you're
lucky.  They symbolise all that is bad about British culture, and give a
good indication of why XTC have gone down like a lead balloon for the past
20 years.  These people wouldn't even know a snot-fest if it was coming out
of their own nostrils.  They'd think it was some kind of cool and groovy art
exhibition with ethnic overtones.  They make me think that maybe we deserved
Thatcher after all, since these cultural 'guides' of ours still can't
appreciate a single thing of beauty over here.  And no one turns round and
says 'Emperor's new clothes'.  Cultural guides?  Cultural eunuchs more like.

Re Higherrrrrrrrrr - the rolling 'rrrrr's' at the end are as true an example
of a West Country accent as any I've ever heard.  If you didn't already know
Andy was a yokel*, this would give it away.

*I say this affectionately and ironically, btw, before you get on my case.
I'm a dimwit Londoner who now lives in chalkhills country anyway.  What
would I know.


Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 2 Dec 1998 08:04:54 EST
Subject: XTC CD-Rs to trade (will also trade for tapes)

Hi all,

I have a small but growing collection of XTC demos and live stuff on CD to
trade. I'd like more!! I will be happy to trade for CD-Rs or tapes. E-mail
for a list!!--Thanks, SP


Message-Id: <>
Date: Wed, 02 Dec 1998 12:53:48 -0600
From: John A Lane <>
Subject: Bambi's Greatest Hits

Jeff Langr did scribe, and I scribe back below:
>Having the government involved in funding art
>is absolutely moronic.
> I personally happen to
>find great artistic appeal in the trails of deer
>shit running through my yard, but I don't see the
>government funding it anytime soon, nor do I expect
>them to.
<<snip, cobble, stitch, weld>>
>Imagine if tomorrow the government decided that
>Phil Collins was the epitome of art, and decided
>to fund his tour (instead of Sears, eh).  I'm sure
>you wouldn't be pleased -- the only reason you're
>happy now with the government funding of art
>is that you think the current trend is "cool."
>Government as arbiters of what is art sounds
>pretty damn frightening to me.  The reality is
>that someone must be willing to consume your
>art, otherwise it is indeed worthless.  If my
>art is deer shit, it should be my problem alone
>that I'm not going to get rich off my art.

While I'm not entirely surprised to see the words "trails of deer shit" and
"Phil Collins" jammed into the same post,  I do find your argument to be a
bit...(dipping finger into the drink you mixed) odd. A strange aftertaste.
Tastes like chicken.
Look, I'll put it simply:
I don't want the government to be arbiters of artistic taste either.
That said, nothing is wrong with the government funding art still.
Governments fund bombs, weapons, 500-hundred-dollar toilet seats, little
machines that go 'ping', and other useless junk.  If that's not arbitrating
taste, than I don't know what is. Thus, I see no problem in the government
giving pocket change to artists (which is what it amounts to by comparison).
The idea of "cool" -- as you put it -- doesn't enter in to the picture.
I'm curious then...was the WPA artwork in the 30s then a massive waste?
(Waiting for Harrison to finish his Snoopy snowcone and jump into the fray.)
"An evil petting zoo?" -- Dr. Evil


Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 02 Dec 1998 14:04:06 -0500
From: Jim Slade <>
Subject: Re: Old People Only

> To anyone who was already an XTC fan in 1983....
> Was there a lot of surprise among listeners when the ornately
> arranged and produced "Mummer" came out after the guitar-bass-drums
> "English Settlement"?  Or was it expected since they were now known
> to be a studio entity only?  And on that topic, was it a surprise
> when they suddenly stopped touring?
> Because I just listened to those two albums and they're very
> different, and everything before "Mummer" is very different from
> everything after "English Settlement".

It's funny that you see Mummer as being much different.  I think that it
flows nicely from ES tracks like "Yacht Dance" and "Senses Working
Overtime".  I hear both albums as being very "wooden," unlike Black Sea,
which is metallic, O&L, which is vinyl, or Nonsuch, which is more like


Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 2 Dec 1998 14:22:04 EST
Subject: Hey

Duncan said:
<<College radio is mostly a bunch of scared wanna-be's that respond to
potential criticism by playing things that are completely hideous and
pretending to really like them, while dancing to ABBA oldies and Kool And
The Gang in the back of their tiny little shrunken minds. Being cool is
really great, isn't it?>>

Hey, I work at a college radio station right now.  I play a lot of
interesting things.  I take offense with what you have said.  I don't think
my show is hideous.  And what's so bad about ABBA?  And I don't have a tiny
little mind.  I post my playlists on my web page.  The URL is  I even played a whole
show about XTC, so I must not have a small brain to do that.  I play what I
want.  Nobody tells me what to play, so sometimes I do play unusual stuff,
but that's what's so great about college radio.  I can play something from
ABBA then go to Pink Floyd.  I do a retro show which is the type of music I
love to listen to.

Well, that's all the rambling for today, I hope I didn't bore you. :)



Date: Wed, 2 Dec 1998 15:46:19 -0500
Subject: Choclate Synthesizer and Super Roots and Uoredoms and Eedoms and so forth
Message-ID: <>
From: (Bar From The Sky)


Dom Sez:

<<<<<<Many of my favourite
bands are included here; ...... Boredoms,>>>>>

WOW! I had no idea Boredoms fans even existed (besides me anyway).

I was about to actually reccomend these psychos here. But I kept

If you ever wondered what it would sound like if Captain Beefheart were
Japanese and was addicted to speed, well, then check out the Boredoms.

I remember the day I was first exposed to these nutcases like it was
yesterday. It was Lollapalooza 1994. It was about a half hour before the
festivities were scheduled to commence, whe I heard al of this crazy was way out of tune..the "singing" was off key...but it
rocked!!  At first, since the show wasn't even supposed to start yet, I
figrued that it was a sound check. But I decided to check out what was
happening onstage, and what do I see? None other than a bunch of goofy
guys jumping all over the place and screaming their lungs out. They were
incredibly loud and noisy. The songs didn't seem to have any direction,
but I was utterly impressed! After 5 minutes, I automatically decided
that The Boredoms were one of the best worst bands on earth!

I sreiously reccomend these guys to anyone with an open mind. IMHO, thei
rbest releases were Pop Tatari and Chocolate Synthesizer. But I warn
you...for adventurous listeners only!

Oh for XTC content....ummm.....Can't wait for Transistor
Blast (not TB! Anyone can wait to get TB.) Hmm...have yet to read Song
Stories. Santy Clause is getting it for  me  :) I hope, anyway.

Blah blah blah...semester's almost over...Hooray!

The _Skybar_ Ken
"Ignore the ignorance just one last first time.
You'll never get used to it, but you will."
--------Mister Misanthrope-------


Message-Id: <9812021454.AA07915@jhensley>
Date: Wed,  2 Dec 1998 14:54:07 -0500
From: "Jon Hensley" <>
Subject: anyone?

Hello all,

I don't frequent this mailing list as much as I'd like and therefore I am
"out of the loop" if you will. My question is probably an easy one to
answer. What label has picked up XTC and is fronting the money for the new
albums? Who is their label in the States? Did I hear correctly that the band
is incorporating a 120 piece orchestra at Abbey Road?

Please contact me at if anyone knows the answers to these




Message-Id: <l03010d00b28b5c5f8174@[]>
Date: Wed, 2 Dec 1998 16:32:01 -0500
From: Duncan Watt <>
Subject: Re: Re:'s (hey... that would be a great band name: "The Re:'s")

okay I wrote:

>> Don't ask the government to get involved.
>> I actually *liked* "Piss Jesus".
...and Jeff L. wrote in response:

>Having the government involved in funding art
>is absolutely moronic.
>Imagine if tomorrow the government decided that
>Phil Collins was the epitome of art, and decided
>to fund his tour (instead of Sears, eh).  I'm sure
>you wouldn't be pleased -- the only reason you're
>happy now with the government funding of art
>is that you think the current trend is "cool."

so... maybe I wasn't clear? I think having the government involved is a BAD
thing... or maybe you were referring to a different "you're"...

>Re: overweight women, I think Ella Fitzgerald,
>Aretha Franklin, Janis Joplin, Mama Cass, and a
>few others weren't exactly skinny.  I'm not going
>to even get into the reality of what performing
>art is all about, but if you have the talent,
>you can still succeed.  Your definition of success
>seems to be MTV, which as far as I'm concerned
>is close to being nothing about art.
>PS, I wouldn't call Ani Difranco art, I find
>her extremely annoying.  So far the only
>definition of "art" that I've been able to
>glean from the 5-29 chalkhills diatribe is that
>it has to be not extremely popular or
>non-mainstream.  That ends up being a
>rather unfortunate definition.

No, the point was, dancing about MTV($$$) and art(...) is like an architect
playing music about... oh Hell, you get it. The problem is, the $$$ is
squeezing out the art music like never before.

And no fair playing the Ella card, that was forever ago. And Aretha, God
Bless Her Soul, is the epitome of my point. She just put an album out! And
she's just as good as she ever was! So why haven't YOU heard it?

okay, and then I dropped my guard in my haste to swear again:
>> There are DEFINITELY no fat *women* in videos. AM I SUPPOSED TO BELIEVE

...and Michael and Derek popped me good by mentioning Missy Elliott, and
that sucks, because I bought that record, and it's actually really cool,
and I should have thought of her, and the fat rappers, like Notorious
B.I.G., and Big Punisher, and... etc. but it doesn't change the fact that
Miss Elliott always has a thin young'un dancing right next to her in each
of her videos... and her first one, Hype Williams ACTUALLY PUT HER IN AN
INFLATABLE SUIT, to... I don't even know. Make her... more fat?

Anyway, I'm just pissed that Chaka Khan can't make a buck. Maybe Prince can
help her.

Duncan Watt


Message-Id: <>
Date: Wed, 02 Dec 1998 17:01:06 -0500
From: "Jason Hauser" <>
Subject: Love Stratosphearic Dukes

Anybody listened to 25 O'Clock in a, erm, uhh, alternate state of mind?  I
thought so.  How 'bout on vinyl, with a 70's stereo system?  Weren't those
70's setups the best?  Anyhoo, just remembering some fun(?) times listening
to this record.  But please don't jump on my case.  I'm older now and I
realize that "those things" are bad, and, kids, don't you do as I did, but
what's done is done.  So how 'bout it?

25 O'Clock: Five!  What?!  The bass, dumdumdumdum, like someone tapping on
your skull.  Perfect cheesy organ riff with Sputnik signals behind.  Love
the Syd Barrett guitar solo.  "At 25 O'Clock, that's when I'm going to be

Bike Ride to the Moon: When this starts, I think of Poe, "whose footfalls
tinkled on the tufted floor".  Feeling good, feeling great, nothing here to
agitate.  Another Syd Barrett type deal.  Oops, sounds like the chain fell

My Love Explodes: Welcome to Bangkok!  Gets confusing now, an awful lot
going on here.  No, paradise don't go wrong!  "My Head Explodes"!

What in the World: Paul McCartney on a loop.  Curly "Penny Lane" type
sounds.  Oh yeah, gotta get the tape playing back'ards.  This song just has
the most awesome bass sound.

Your Gold Dress: That guitar's startin' her up, sounds like it's coming from
out in the garage.  "Vibrations coming my way.." , big time!  The lyrics are
suggesting something psychedelic, don't ya think?  This is the best song on
the album for complete departure.

The Mole From the Ministry: What starts out as merely morose, shortly
becomes terrifying.  This song has a big "I Am the Walrus" feel, completely
eerie.  "I'm the mole from the ministry, and you'll all bow down to me."
Yeesh, I wanna crawl outta my skin!  Seriously time for some fresh air after
this one.

One more thing.
lemoncurry said:
By the way, though I'm male, all this wanking is a bit tiresome, isn't it ?
-literally, or figuratively?

If Daddy could see today, he'd be turning in his grave-
ChuChu McMillimeter


Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 02 Dec 1998 18:15:20 -0400
From: Harrison Sherwood <>
Organization: Intermetrics, Inc.
Subject: A Round of Lime Rickeys!


Chalkhills #5-29 ROCKED.

Duncan Watt can give my daughter diet tips any time he wants. Suggestion for
a tattoo, Duncan, if you're into that sort of thing: Tasteful little thing
on your arm, maybe in Gill Sans, sez "This Is Not a Tattoo." Have your dad
check it for typos.

Thank you to Wes Hanks for finding that Martin Newell retort:

> Immortality will be conferred only upon those stanzas and lyrics that etch
> their way into the public's affections via truth, beauty or humour. Then the
> poetry vs pop lyrics debate becomes irrelevant.

Or, summing up both Duncan's and Martin's theses, but In a Whole Nother
Buncha Words,

    When you're pooching out product that's lyrical
    Stay away from those topics satirical
	As might gross out a preacher
	Or Sunday School teacher
 	If you wish for success stratospherical

And last but a long way from least:

> From: Dominic Lawson <>
> Subject: Quirk Is A Four Letter Word

Dominic, in the highest sincerity, that was a goddamned brilliant piece of
writing, and I consider it a privilege to share a mailing list with somebody
who posts as elegantly as that.

Give us more, please.

> And look, all that text and not a single snot-fest!

Put up one of those essays every month or so and see how many fewer
snot-fests you have to participate in.

Harrison "I dare you" Sherwood


Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 07:42:47 +0800 (SST)
Message-Id: <>
From: Kevin M Mathews <>
Subject: Shameless Self-Promotion


POPLAND - Groovy

This is a new CD album from my band POPLAND that will be carried by Not Lame
Recordings in their winter catalog. POPLAND is Tim Nolan and myself and we
are based in Singapore.

It's ten tracks of sweet melodic pop that rocks hard in the right places and
gets soft & warm where necessary.


Write to Not Lame at P.O. Box 2266 Ft. Collins, CO 80522  USA, e-mail
<> or visit the website at

Thank you for your attention.

Back to the regular programming ...

Kevin Mathews
Touched by the Power of Pop


Message-ID: <>
From: "Amanda Owens" <>
Subject: A...A....CHOO!!!
Date: Wed, 02 Dec 1998 17:44:12 PST

Scuse me, my mother gave me an early Christmas present-her cold. So I've
been living on soup and vanilla Frappucino for the past few days.
But enough of that-response time!

Tracy said:
>Anyone interested in seeing pictures of XTC in Suma Studios go to >this
>plus a couple of bonus XTC in concert pics.  Enjoy

Been there-yowza! I was dying over the expressions on Dave's and Andy's
faces on the fourth picture down-the one captioned "Three Cyclists of
the Apocalypse." CLASSIC!

On the subject of overweight women in videos-What about Ann Wilson?
Alison Moyet?

The effervescent Molly said:
>It was funny at first, but now it's getting sick.

I've been quite enjoying the genital banter myself. But then again I was
born with my mind in the gutter.

Tis all for now,
Amanda C. Owens
"People will always be tempted to wipe their feet on anything with
welcome written on it."-Andy Partridge
XTC song of the day-Pink Thing
Non XTC song-The Flag-Barenaked Ladies


Message-Id: <v01540b03b28baa192b8d@[]>
Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 15:39:34 +1300
From: (James Dignan)
Subject: Phil too? [1]

Is now a good time to mention that Phil Collins plays drums on my favourite
album??? Check the credits of Eno's "Before and after science" sometime
[2]! Ten points to Phil! He also gains two bonus points for
recording, as his first cover, the Beatles' "Tomorrow Never Knows", and one
point for the drumming on Peter Gabriel's song "Intruder" [3]. However, he
loses five points per album for everything he has done after that first
solo album in 1981, whether solo or with Genesis, and one further point off
for every album he's appeared on since then. That would take his total to
about negative 537.

[1] it's a NZ music reference. Ten points to YOU if you know what it refers to!

[2] Interestingly, one D. Mattacks is also present, alongside Robert Fripp,
Phil Manzanera, Percy Jones and Fred Frith.

[3] I'm still waiting for a Trent Reznor cover of "Intruder"... BTW, that
Peter Gabriel album (the melting face one) also features one D. Gregory,
alongside Kate Bush, Robert Fripp, Paul Weller, Jerry Marotta, and Tony
Levin. Anyone wanting to 'six degree' from XTC could find no better
starting point than these two albums!


PS - re recent debate on different slang terms: It makes me want to laugh,
it makes me want to cry.


Date: 3 Dec 98 14:01:24 AED
Subject: Mojo
Message-ID: <>

Did anyone else notice this?

The October issue of Mojo magazine has a feature, "100 Greatest Singers of
All Time", as voted for by a large and varied contingent of vocalists.
Among the voting panel is one Andy Partridge.

I'd love to see the list of singers he chose!



Message-ID: <>
From: Noriko Sadatsune <>
Subject: Re: A Collideascope of Corninessv
Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 10:34:09 -0000

Jason Hauser wrote:
>Noriko said:
>"Ball and chain ( Reminds me of Newbury bypath
>-Hmm, Newbury Bypath, is that the latest heart surgery, as said by Sylvester
>the Cat?

Hi Jason,

Yeah, it's a kind of road surgery, isn't it?



Message-ID: <004701be1ea7$65c789a0$724797d0@ginsim>
From: "Simon Deane/Gina Chong" <>
Subject: Re: Pooey Old Grump
Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 18:26:31 +0800

Harrison Sherwood amusingly contributed the following recently, amongst
other bits and pieces:

>>I don't know.... This might be getting a little too arty, Bob, a little too
>>*syncretic.* I see Simon's eyebrows becoming even more closely knit than
>>usual, forehead furrowing painfully, as he runs your proposition through his
>>Ronco Desktop Wank-o-Meter<tm>'ve passed the Street Cred
>>benchmark...survived the rigorous Pomp Gauge...and ba-BING you're OK on the
>>ClapTrap-a-tron...*whew*! That was the one I was _sure_ he was going to get
>>you on. Dodged a bullet, there, Bob!

Actually Harrison, I'm using a 'wankonometer'. I looked into getting the
Ronco but it was a little expensive whilst suffering from a few too many
gimmicks (viz. the Pomp Gauge and the Claptrapatron, amongst others, you
mentioned) which seriously affected the accuracy of the readings for its
principal function. I invested in a local model manufactured by the
appropriately named Wang Kee Electonics ("Wang Kee" is Cantonese for
"belonging to Wang", before anyone asks). I'm very happy with its
performance up to now and I'd recommend it to anyone interested in weeding
out self-indulgent poppycock from their day to day reading.

Incidentally, thanks to everyone who came up with improvements on Clayderman
for indoctrinating my daughter with.

I'm off now to look up the meaning of "syncretic".

All the best
Simon "The Furrow" Deane

(In case anyone cares, most of this posting is intended as a joke.)


From: "Leon X. Deggs" <>
Subject: Mummer vs. Settlement
Message-Id: <>
Date: Thu, 03 Dec 1998 02:44:41 PST

A virgin poster, ladies and gentlemen.

So, someone somewhere from someplace mentioned the diversity of Mummer and
English Settlement.
On this subject: My mum always taught me NEVER to compare one thing with
something else when there are too many obvious discrepancies.
Yes, yes. How can you find out the discrepancies without comparison. I know,
but that's Mother Wisdom for you.

Also, I am STILL of the deep-founded and (possibly) ill-informed opinion
that it's absolutely possible to see which songs were penned while Chambers
was still at the throne.
Any ideas anyone.
Private EMails allowed :-)

Someone please explain what the chuffing buggery f*ck Genesis has got to do
with XTC. Apart from the fact that Partridge slated Collins' style when he
broke up with Marienne.


Leon X. Deggs


Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 03:01:54 -0800 (PST)
Message-Id: <v01510100b28c1384a4cd@[]>
From: (Mark Fisher)
Subject: fun, fun, funding

Jeff L said:
>Having the government involved in funding art
>is absolutely moronic

Well, it might be moronic if it involved the President personally choosing
his favourite artists and bunging them some cash out of his own wallet, but
government funding of the arts doesn't work like that.

Standard practice is to have an arts council operating at arm's length from
the government (ie not subject to government policy in matters of taste).
Such councils are made up of people sympathetic to the arts, advised by
artists and specialists in the various fields. If the organisation is
running efficiently, it will be responsive to those areas of artistic
activity most worthy and in need of financial support.

Sorry to go off topic, but I've enjoyed far too much art that has been
created with the help of "government" money to let Jeff's remarks go

- Mark


Message-ID: <>
Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 07:29:18 EST
Subject: top pics

Three cheers to "tracyxtc" for posting those wonderful,
Donovan-free photos of XTC's O&L sessions!  Beats the
stuff in "Song Stories," even.  Speaking for myself, the
phrase "billious envy" doesn't begin to cover it.



From: "Andy" <>
Organization: The University of Nottingham
Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 12:46:40 GMT0BST
Subject: Re: Chunky Stew
Message-Id: <>

Alan J. Martin said
> cite the lyric "and you believe all that junk is too"

So that'll be "all that junk is tRUE" then won't it?
I still think "chunky stew" is cool though


End of Chalkhills Digest #5-31

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