Precedence: bulk
Subject: Chalkhills Digest #5-222

         Chalkhills Digest, Volume 5, Number 222

                  Thursday, 10 June 1999

Today's Topics:

                 AV1, version 2 w/ demos
             Re: AV1: The Singles?/Hitchcock
                      Third Single?
            dosing the masses + first time xtc
                     The Good Things
               Go ahead, bring on the 34D!
              Re: Girls Just Wanna Have 34D
               My local record store sucks
      The Greatest XTC Album/Rich Burnell's website
             The girl with colitis goes by...
     Just filled with Love and musical wet dreams now
                     Lacking Irony...
                        a rarity?
                   Horkin' up hairballs
                    Johnny AppleVenus
                        XTC on NPR


    To UNSUBSCRIBE from the Chalkhills mailing list, send a message to
    <> with the following command:


    For all other administrative issues, send a message to:


    Please remember to send your Chalkhills postings to:


    World Wide Web: <>

    The views expressed herein are those of the individual authors.

    Chalkhills is compiled with Digest 3.7 (John Relph <>).

Grown from a nice young lady to a child.


Subject: AV1, version 2 w/ demos
Message-Id: <0006800012028692000002L022*@MHS>
Date: Tue, 8 Jun 1999 09:12:35 +0200

Hi "Kreideberger",

One of my favorite fellow "Magic Roundabout" connoiseurs, Mark Strijbos,

>What is much more exiting is that Cooking Vinyl is considering
>the November release of the perfect XTC Xmas gift: a double CD
>_and_ LP (yes!) with the Apple Venus demos and outtakes (!!!).

My message to Cooking Vinyl:

DO IT!  DO IT!  DO IT!  Please, just do it!

Waiting for AV1, version 2 -

- Jeff


Message-Id: <>
Subject: Re: AV1: The Singles?/Hitchcock
Date: Mon, 7 Jun 1999 23:30:03 -0500
From: "K.D." <>

On 6/7/99 10:22 AM wrote:

>Robyn Hitchcock is a fabulous live act. Not only that, he's opening for Jon
>Brion at Largo tomorrow and I'm going! Yay, me! Oddly, I know very little
>about his recorded output, although I've seen him live probably eight times
>in the past two years; I was put off early in life by the Yip Song, which
>was the first thing of his I'd heard and which I find spectacularly
>annoying, and quite surprised by how much I loved his live acoustic shows
>much later on. So I'm always afraid to buy one of his 500,000 CDs in case
>it's more in the Yip vein. (I did buy the soundtrack to the Demme picture,
>though.) Any personalized recommendations based on those parameters would
>be muchly appreciated.

Yeah, he has TONS of material out...very prolific.  I'm proud to say that
I own quite a few of his albums on cd.  I think that of what I own the
album I Often Dream of Trains is my favorite...Moss Elixir is great too,
as is Globe of Frogs.  Any of his greatest hits cd's are fantastic to
have too.  I wish that I could say that I've seen him live as his shows
are pretty fun from what I've heard from friends that have seen him live.
 Very interesting person.



Message-ID: <>
Date: Tue, 08 Jun 1999 12:35:09 +0100
From: chris vreeland <>
Organization: Vreeland Graphics
Subject: Residents

Lo, I emerge at long last to post about something I might actually KNOW!
This probably means nothing to you....

Tyler Hewitt says:

> Current thinking about the Residents and who they might be suggests
>that anyone who works with them, even one-shot deals where someone
>shows up and gets dragged into the studio (which is what I think
>Andy's contribution is) becomes a Resident for the time they are
>actually working with the band.

When I was about ten, a friend of my dad's known to me as "One Armed
George" (the irony of which didn't escape me because, coincidentally, he
had but one arm) showed up at my dad's house with a copy of "Meet the
Residents." He was particularly enthusiastic because he had been
recruited to play trumpet on the record, by the band whom he described
as "some freinds of mine" despite the fact that he'd never played
trumpet in his life, and had but one arm with which to do so. He'd  been
just "hanging around" at their studio/warehouse one day, and they
good-naturedly decided that he should contribute to the record in some

This represents a sum total of my knowledge of The Residents, but it
probably is an good example of a wider ethos evinced in their musical

Chris "smelly tounges" Vreeland


Message-ID: <>
Date: Tue, 8 Jun 1999 14:57:55 EDT
Subject: Third Single? lists "Greenman" on CD single, to be released 26 JUL 99 as Cooking
Vinyl FRYCD084. Apologies if this has already been mentioned or is bad

--Ira : )


Message-ID: <>
Date: Tue, 08 Jun 1999 14:31:45 -0700
Subject: dosing the masses + first time xtc

i know nothing and will research nothing on the soluability of lsd, but
i remember hearing something once about a conspiracy to put acid on the
backs of millions of postage stamps. this seems like not a "good" idea,
but practical for all intents and purposes. i'm not sure if this concept
comes from a novel, movie or perhaps the writing of jerry rubin or one
of those yippie guys. of course nowadays we have self-adhering postage
stamps in the u.s. (curses, foiled again)
and what exactly would be the point of this? just a gag to piss off the
squares? or do the culprits wait until everyone's tripping and then....
well..... uh... what exactly?
* ----------------------------------------
the following is probably a long-dead, ancient topic. be that as it may,
here goes:
do you remember the *first* time you *ever* heard xtc's music?
i remember being on the school bus (!) on my way home, and our driver
playing the radio (WBCN, boston) and hearing "....1-2-3-4-5 [pregnant
pause] senses working overtime..." and thinking "what a cool song." (i
guess i was in eighth grade at the time) i told my best friend about it
and we began requesting it on our most excellent local community college
station all the time (along with "ant muzic" and "computer dating" by
patrick d. martin - comments?). the rest is, of course, history. we
bought the old albums and the new ones as they came out. its a rather
sentimental memory for me and quite unforseeable that someday i would be
writing about it to a bunch of fellow fans on a computer network forum
i'm interested to hear other peoples first awareness of xtc.
(incidentally, i realized later on that i had heard 'respectable street'
even earlier on the radio too, maybe once or twice, but never knew who
it was.)

oh the party goes with a swing
when we talk about the trivial things,


Message-ID: <>
Date: Tue, 8 Jun 1999 18:07:52 EDT
Subject: The Good Things

Introducing for the very last time:


I worked in record stores thru-out the 80's, and as a result accumulated a
shload of memorabilia of our fave lads and of a lot of other 80's bands.
The main item I horded was pins....pinbacks/badges/buttons...I'm a full on
freaky geek for those things and have well over 250 of 'em.  I've got about
20 or so of XTC....and the rest are of some very cool and some not so very
cool bands from the 80's.  I'm hoping that one of you Chalkies shares my
passion for these glorious little icons to the new wave era.  I've got a
couple of extra XTC ones which I'll gladly trade for ones I don't
have....and if you are looking for a specific band, let me know, I've got a
bunch.  Drop me a line if you wanna swap some, or if you have some that you
would like to get rid of.  I'll buy or trade for any XTC ones........check
my link to Optimsim's Flames, my XTC trade site, provided below....I've got
a lot of schtuff to use as trade bait. a healthy response to my Falkner for blanks post....look forward
to gettin' the blanks & I hope you all dig the tape!

Oh II.....anyone hear the new Fountains Of Wayne?...I recently reviewed it,
damn good.

Optimism's Flames:


Message-ID: <>
Date: Tue, 8 Jun 1999 22:22:52 EDT
Subject: Go ahead, bring on the 34D!

Belinda rebuked to my stereotypical description of a Blonde by saying:


What, pray, dear John Gardner, is a typical blonde.
And how does the character of a typical blonde differ from that
of a typical blond female. Did she have big tits too?

Belinda (shoulder length dark blonde/mousy coloured dead straight
fine hair which has a perm in it to make it curlier and make it
look thicker, giving it more body, and has two different shades
of hilites in, one shade is a bleach blonde which many many
hilites gives a shimmering summery look about it, and another a
mid colour hilite in between the natural mouse and the bleach
blonde, so as to give the effect of a fuller head of thicker
healthy shiny hair. I thank you.)

Since you asked, the female in question did *not* have Big tits, BUT, had
nothing in the Grey Cells department!

Forgive me for saying that this *particular* blonde was dumb.  But this
particular blonde *was* given the facts I had layed out.  My apologies for
stereotyping her in a a category which may have brought offense to other
*blonde* females on our digest; Present Company excepted!!!

John *who did not have time to be politcally correct* Gardner

P.S. My girlfriend has *blonde* hair, for the record.

P.P.S.  The additional colour hi-light is groovie too!


Message-ID: <>
From: Bob Crain <>
Subject: Re: Girls Just Wanna Have 34D
Date: Tue, 08 Jun 1999 20:00:17 PDT

>Message-ID: <> Date: Sat, 05 Jun 1999 11:39:05
>+0100 From: B Blanchard <> Subject: Girls Just Wanna
>Have 34D
>Belinda (shoulder length dark blonde/mousy coloured dead straight fine hair
>which has a perm in it to make it curlier and make it look thicker, giving
>it more body, and has two different shades of hilites in, one shade is a
>bleach blonde which many many hilites gives a shimmering summery look about
>it, and another a mid colour hilite in between the natural mouse and the
>bleach blonde, so as to give the effect of a fuller head of thicker healthy
>shiny hair. I thank you.)

                Yes, but do you have big tits?

-Bob Crain


Message-Id: <>
Date: Wed, 9 Jun 1999 14:54:12 +1000
Subject: My local record store sucks

As I *still* don't have Nonsuch on CD, and haven't actually seen it for
sale anywhere, I wandered over to my local record store (some of you might
remember me mentioning the sales clerk with the pierced face who referred
to XTC as "fucking poofter music" - sadly, he still works there) and put in
an order for an import copy. Although I was told it would take two to three
weeks, this has now stretched into about two months.

I've got the hump. Now I'm asking you guys. If there's anyone on the list
who knows where I can find a CD copy of Nonsuch (this probably applies to
Australian list members only) or can grab a copy for me and I'll reimburse
you (this goes out to everyone), I would be *eternally grateful* and will
shower you with praise and thanks. Email me privately if you can help.

While I'm here.......

>>Note to Iain on Stranger Things....
>>Please go buy that Duran Duran album!  I need a good laugh!

>>- May

It seems I no longer need to. A fellow Australian Chalk-duster has offered
to lend me his copy, so I can hear this wondrous recording for myself.
Isn't that nice?

>>Peter Cook and Dudley Moore were in on it by 1966
when they publicly promoted the drug on both TV
("The LSBumble Bee") and vinyl ("Psychedelic

There's a movie (or at least, a video - I don't know if it ever got
theatrical release) called "Derek & Clive Get The Horn", where Cook and
Moore were filmed making an album. It becomes fairly clear, early in the
piece, that they're both out of their skulls, but I'd always assumed (from
listening to the record) that they were just drunk. There's almost
certainly a case for suggesting that they were on something stronger,
though - how you could come up with a skit about pulling lobsters out of
Jayne Mansfield's arsehole *without* consuming mind-bending drugs is
anyone's guess (although I'm sure someone will tell me).

>>I think it would be nice if Andy participated in a forum once in a while,
or provided a site or address where a moderated set of questions could be
addressed to him. Would it kill him? We don't bite.

Well, some of us do, but not where it'll show....

>>He was not averse
to doing a bit of a "meet-&-greet" around the US to promote the new album,
so why not give us poor schmucks in the Antipodies a bit of a break, huh?

Well put, Sir Duncan. I couldn't agree more (well, I *am* Australian - did
you really expect any other kind of response?).

"Storefront Hitchcock" will be featured at this year's Sydney Film
Festival, and Hitch himself will be here to introduce it. Cool, huh? The
SFF brochure dropped a bit of a clanger though - they wrote him up as being
a former member of "The Pet Shop Boys" (ooops!)

I really should stop reading these digests when I'm at work trying to look
busy. Howls of derisive laughter (Bruce) don't go down too well with the
Army....speaking of which, my computer at work has the AV1 album cover as
the desktop background (thanks to Paul Culnane for sending that over - I'd
been looking for a replacement for my bitmap of Amanda Vanstone with a
beard), and my supervisor (Army geezer) saw it the other day and asked what
it was. After I told him it was the new XTC album cover, he mumbled some
sort of acknowledgement and went back to his office singing.... can probably guess, can't you?....

...."Generals And Majors".

I wonder if anyone else could sense the irony?



Message-Id: <>
From: "Shoalin" <>
Subject: The Greatest XTC Album/Rich Burnell's website
Date: Wed, 9 Jun 1999 12:54:23 +0700

I just visited the new XTC site described by Rich Burnell in the last

>>Yes, I went through every song on XTC's major album work, gave
descriptions to each of them, and rated
>>them. Just thought I'd tell everyone since all the work would sorta go
>>to waste if the page just sat there. is the URL for the XTC part of
>>the page.

Here is a sample (which lists English Settlement as the 8th "best" XTC

>>#8: English Settlement (1982)

>>"Sort of a blueprint for Skylarking which came four years later. The
music, though a lot of it is excellent, is really too messy to be truly
lush like the band seems to be trying for, and many songs on the second
part of the album (aside from a couple amazing ones) don't seem finished,
either that or they go on way too long. Still, it began the path that XTC
followed to this day."

A blueprint for Skylarking???  Songs that don't seen finished???  I beg to
differ, but if the entire Chalkhills population voted on what is arguably
the greatest (and/or their favorite) XTC album I have little doubt that it
would be English Settlement (especially among those who were already XTC
fans when this album was released).  It is admittedly difficult to compare
swans (especially when one's talking about XTC albums), but in my view (and
those of many Chalkhiller's) English Settlement is one of the greatest
albums ever produced by anyone ever!!

Number 8??? A blueprint for Skylarking??  May I suggest a new blueprint for
your musical-reviewing brain.



Message-ID: <>
Date: Tue, 08 Jun 1999 23:00:36 -0700
From: Yoshiko Yeto <>
Subject: The girl with colitis goes by...

Fellow Chalkhillians-

Unlike Melissa Reave's formerly undivided attention toward lyrics, I find
myself absolutely mesmerized by bass, guitar, and keyboard parts.
Consequently, I never manage to fully to grasp lyrics, even by the very
toppermost of the poppermost.  This ever so slight "problem" is compounded
by the selective nature of my cognitive skills.  The following examples
substantiate this chronic, inoperative malady.

In "Runaways", I never fail to "hear" Colin sing the words "dope fly".  For
a couple of protracted millenniums, I perfectly understood that Elvis
Costello was singing the following lines: "Now I know that your arcane
halls, built with tenderness and brute force".  At times, I actually prefer
my misguided interpretations of ye olde English classics of yore.

Natural selection at its devolutional apex,

Malady Nelson, Esquirette

"What is---face to face with the real---this intermediary work of the
-Robert Bresson


Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 9 Jun 1999 09:44:44 EDT
Subject: Just filled with Love and musical wet dreams now

Hello XTC Clan...

Flashback: Acid hit...fatty tissue tigers and trailers....

I had not even heard of XTC when I was in high school.  In 1980, I hadn't a
CLUE to who XTC were.  I went to a college prep school, one reminiscent of
Jonathon Powers' _The Last Catholic in America_, or, _Do Black Patten
Leather Shoes Really Reflect Up?_

At Fenwick H. S. in the west suburbs of Chicago, we mostly swam fast, drank
a lot of beers on the weekends, chewed tobacco in class (which we received
corporal punishment in the form of a good paddling on the gluteus maximus
as a result of that), and would smoke ganj on the weekends.  No clue that a
significantly influential band had unleashed itself from Swindon, England.

I had played the drums for 11 years by then, played percussion and drummed
in the school bands, Jazz, Concert, and Symphony, and in 2 rock bands on
the side.  My mother was a concert pianist at the Chicago Symphony
Orchestra, so I get my musical inclination from her.  But, while I was a
rock drummer, then, I was getting lessons on the Cello and Piano from some
of them thar musicians from the CSO.  So, my childhood, and teen years, did
not suck, from a strictly musical point of view.

I mean, I was learning Mozart, and Beethoven, Brahms and Franz Haydn, and
learning it too fast for my own good.  Later, I would fall in love with
Bach's Suites for Cello, played by Yo Yo Ma.  Man!  What a fucking trip
that was.  And, on the side, I was drumming with my *3rd and 4th World's
Greatest Garage and Basement Bands,* to Elvis Costello, Rush, Boston, The
Who, The Grateful Dead, The Doors, The Talking Heads, and The Police!  Man,
what I missed out on then!  XTC!  I was on the circuit, you know, playing
clubs, garage parties, basement parties, the bars and bar mitzvahs! This
was the scene, Man! Then College got in the way of all that.  There was a
rift and suddenly, I was listening to more music than playing it.

When college came in '84, out the window went the Piano and Cello; the
drumset was the only thing that would fit in Mom's stationwagon on the big
move to college.  Then, music was nothing like it is now.  I stopped
listening to the radio, only listening to vinyl, tapes and CD's.  But,
thank Dear GOD I did listen to the radio, because I would not have heard,
in the summer of 1984, on WXRT Radio Chicago,_Generals and Majors_.  I was
hooked!  Lock, stock and barrel!  Who is this band?  Where the bleep do I
get a copy?  Who is with me?  By 1984, how many XTC albums were out?  How
much had I missed then?

From 1984, I would follow XTC, mostly by Black Sea on CD to start, and
then album by album thereafter until this year!  And, of course no thanks
to Andy, IT did burn a hole in my pocketbook!  For years, I searched for
Go2, Drums and Wires, and White Music, and finally got copies of them in

Earlier this year, while dicking around on the Internet due to the XTC
musical lull and no new albums at the record stores to speak of, I was
browsing and doing WORD SEARCHES for XTC, when I came across

What a great place!  And, recently there was a pang of consciousness
ringing in my head!  I got an itch to buy and listen to something I had
never heard before.  This idea was already on the Chalkhills' website.

This weekend, I got in the mail, Chalkhill's Children '96, '97, '98 tapes.
Since then?  It's been non-stop!

Thank you Richard Pedretti-Allen!  For you I am much in debt!  The
Executive Producer!

Mastered by Peter Fitzgerald, at Shabby Road Studios!  Thank you Peter!

And, Cover ArtWork by Harrison Sherwood!  Thank you Harrison!

All the Chalk-Musicians on these tapes, and there are a lot of you, Thank
you too!

You're collective passion for music is so much more pronounced, now that
the bongwater is really kickin' in!  Yes, my hair and scalp are tingling
too!  I think I really understand what Chalkhills is all about, thanks to
these tapes!  You are all such gifted musicians, that I am proud to be a
chalkie.  I think after listening to you all on tape, I understand your
points of view and can connect with your posts a little better; whether its
banjos or heavy metal; it don't matter.

And I have to say, that, I have a deep jealousy for musicians like you
three, and all of the Chalkhill's members who have contributed to this
TRIBUTE to XTC, and your burning desire to contribute to the COMMUNITY.
(Now, having recently dusted off the kit, and playing regularly, all I want
to do is get some of the boys together, and jam to XTC!  I only hope to
some day, provide you with an accolade by which you can remember me by.
Musically speaking of course!)

And, Harrison, I had to crack up a LOT when I read the cover art for
Chalkhills '97.  I got to the *bongwater* part and had to blow out the hit
because I could not stop laughing!  LOL!  And, I had to read until the END,
which is HERE, just because!  Thanks for making me laugh!  I needed that!
<Cough, cough. Red & watery eyes, too!>

The point of my dribble is very clear.  The love we share for XTC is
obsessive.  No doubt.  Otherwise, we would not be here on this digest
(Thanks John Relph!)

I will wager than not one subscriber would not agree that XTC is the most
prolific band on a contemporary level!  It is for me, having chucked most
of the classical music out from my catalogue; well, I set them aside for
the time being, except for Yo Yo Ma.  Dingleburt Humperdink?  Who the Bleep
is that anyway?

Listening to XTC is too compulsive, that I feel I want to listen to these
tapes more than the real thing.  Has a Chalk member ever got burnt out on
XTC?  Can one *overdose* on XTC?

Last night when I heard *Dear God,* sung solo by Jennifer Geese, probably
in a church (?), thank you Jennifer, I had to stop the tape and play the
real thing.  Because the song, after hearing Jennifer sing it, was just so
overwhelming to me; I had no choice but to play the original version and
read along with the lyrics, just because it was a song that I generally
ignored, lyrically speaking! Who cares about a reduction in the price of
beer anyway?  It is the religious conviction of Andy, which goes out the
window, that was most impressive to me.

Since my parents decision to send me to Catholic schools from grade school
to my choice in College, I have had strong convictions about religion until
hearing *Dear God* years ago.  And, listening to Jennifer's version, only
re-affirms certain tenet's, or credo's for me about Catholicism.  Did you
know that most atheists are fallen Catholics?  I am still a Catholic, but
have split feelings on the Catholic Church, the Pope and his belligerent
view points on certain issues, and I feel more like a smorgasbord
catholic*a dash of this, a dash of that.*

However, I must say that the songs on the three set tapes are terrific, but
mostly Jennifer's version of *Dear God.*

Each musician's perspective on his or her XTC song is so cool, that you
begin to appreciate more of the raw emotion put into the craftmanship and
production of their tunes than the tunes themselves.  Add that emotion to
the conjunctive posts, and voila!  Now there's PERSPECTIVE!

I love other musicians' versions of these songs; and I am not talking about
Bands Covering XTC.  From purely a Chalkhills' Musician's Point of View,
your energy and talent, and in most cases your solo efforts to engineer and
record your chosen songs, are all to be commended!  Yes, I am gushing, but
so what!

But, for me, *Dear God* DID something new for me, giving me a brand new
look at XTC!  THAT SONG also provides a new perspective on my life,
lighting a fire that had long since burnt out, I should think, being that I
am a smorgasbord Catholic of course.  Who knows what the result of it will
be?  (Maybe my convictions about religion will change even more, and yes, I
am aware that I haven't actually said what those convictions are; on

So, to end of my short dissertation, I will leave you with the following:

"Genius is the power of leaving one's own aims, interests, wishes and
desires entirely out of sight.  Of entirely renouncing one's own
personality, to knowing subject = clear vision of the world!"
-Schopenhauer, 1812.

I am forever in your humble debts!  Oh, ye old Masters du XTC!

John The Penitent Gardner
Getting his feet wet in the Chicago River


Date: Wed, 9 Jun 1999 11:25:29 +0200 (MET DST)
From: Martin van Rappard <>
Subject: Lacking Irony...
Message-ID: <>

Ha! Two people already took offense at my 10 Reasons To Unsub's "Andy
probably thinks we're idiots", and while I'm pleased that I managed to
irritate two people, they should have checked the rest of the list, "Too
many listers irony impaired" being one of the other reasons. Get a life,
you geeks - not everything merits a reply, least of all your postings.:)



Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 09 Jun 1999 08:27:46 -0700
Subject: a rarity?

i found this cd yesterday: "a place of general happiness, lyrics by
ernest noyes brookings, vol.ii" it's a  compilation by various artists
putting the late brooking's poetry to music. track #11 is by xtc
(actually only andy) doing a song called 'rocket', about space travel.
kind of an odd song, one of those andy tunes that seems to pull you in
two directions at once (think early xtc). the word 'quirky' comes to
mind, i hate to say it. has anyone else ever heard of this? i thought it
quite a score when i picked it up.
other artists on the cd include: young fresh fellows, bim skala bim,
incredible casuals, lonesome bob, et al.
the cd was executive produced by david greenberger, who did the comic
book series "duplex planet" and the cover art is by daniel clowes
(eightball!). i'm not sure how old or obscure this is. i'd never heard
of it before yesterday. anyway, something for the xtc completist to look

the radio is blaring out,


Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 9 Jun 1999 12:49:53 -0700 (PDT)
From: Chris Desmond <>
Subject: Horkin' up hairballs

The obviously astute Dorothy Spirito said:
>Subject: Re: John Gardner's Big Day...
>To what can I compare the feeling generated by reading the wedding
>It was like looking at a hairball freshly horked up by a cat in the
>middle of a party.
>The cat then sits back, satisfied.
>And I laugh at the absurdity.

Well, Dorothy, goddam and thank you! I felt much the same way, though
to  put it in those words is near genius, I must say.

I too was filled with disgust at the overbearing smugness of Mr.
Gardner's post. Are we to be impressed at his lofty position high above
the "Typical blonde with nothing to show for herself, in the Midwest of
the U.S. of A.," as he describes the bride without a trace of irony.
What the fuck? I underestimated you in past posts, John -- you're far
more of a prick than I thought.

And what ARE we to make of this from John?:
"The bride was in introvert, and the groom, an extrovert; from two
different poles of thinking, two different family lifestyles, values
and religions, and having, seemingly, nothing in common, and having two
completely different careers. I have always knew [sic] that they were
wrong for each other. They seemed to me to be getting married out of

An introvert marrying an extrovert? Different poles of thinking?
Different types of families? And even **different careers**??? Good
god, what is this world coming to? Convenience is certainly the only
explanation for this marriage. John, how dare you let the wedding go
on! Superiority carries with it a huge amount of responsibility, and
you must use it wisely! And, may I say, that I can only hope you find
or have found someone as rarefied in their judgement of others as
yourself to spend the rest of your life (in hell) with.

And then, this lovely passage:
"Sorry, but I had to laugh during their ceremony.  It was typical
Catholic ceremony, and at the reception, everyone got hammered, and no
one was really thinking of the couple, except the bet at the table was
how long they would actually be married!  Maybe their was a *bun in the
oven* and that was the factor motivating them to get

Ah yes, the all-knowing Gardner knew, yes *knew* what everyone wasn't
thinking about. And seems to think that everyone getting hammered at
the reception (how unusual!) actually meant something about the
couple's future. And finally, almost predictably, the evil spectre of a
possible pre-marital pregnancy rears its unnecessary head. Oh John, our
sympathies at the horrible thoughts that were forced through your head
go out to you en masse, I am certain.

To see you quoting "The Ugly Underneath" amidst your self-satisfied
"insights" into the wedding made me ill. Somehow, I think Andy wrote it
to describe others more deserving than this couple you describe. Such
as, maybe, YOU.

Hoping you're feelin' good about yourself,

Chris Desmond


Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 9 Jun 1999 16:46:04 EDT
Subject: Johnny AppleVenus

Hey Chuggers--

In defense of John Chapman (no relation to Mark David), Dorothy wrote
in no. 221:

>>John Chapman (1774-1845), a/k/a "Johnny Appleseed", was
a real person.  He was born in Massachusetts but went west
around 1800 bearing apples for planting and books for teaching,
spending the rest of his life traveling Ohio and Indiana,
growing healing herbs and caring for settlers and
natives, who regarded him as something of a saint.

My personal opinion?  What a neat guy.  The midwest back then
mayn't've been modern-day Calcutta, but he ranks right up there
with Mother Theresa in my estimation.<<

Actually, from what I've heard, he was a bit of a nut, promoting
the good effects of his beloved apples to the point of trying to
convince people that the Garden of Eden story was a malicious
slander of this most noble of fruits (sounds like the work of the
International Pear and Peach Council to me!)

--Melissa "aluminum foil not only makes a lovely hat, it helps block the
government's mind control rays" Reaves


Message-ID: <000f01beb29a$e818ce00$>
From: "Steven Paul" <>
Subject: XTC on NPR
Date: Wed, 9 Jun 1999 18:09:24 +0100

Just heard David Greenbuer (sp) review AV1 for NPR, All Things Considered.
(Wed June 9, 1999 at 5:55 pm PST).  My wife called me from home and
excitedly told me that "they were talking about XTC".  Luckily I have a
radio in my office and quicly turned on NPR (90.1 FM in Salt Lake City,
Utah) and heard then quickly plug AV1 by playing parts of "I'd Like That"
and "River Of Orchids" then saying in effect that XTC have used the
orchestration as the basis for this album, not as an after thought.  The
review closed with "The Last Balloon".

I wish I would have had a blank tape to insert to help my recollection of
what the reviewer said.  Listen for "All Things Considered" over the next
couple of days, sometimes they repeat.


End of Chalkhills Digest #5-222

Go back to the previous page.