Precedence: bulk
Subject: Chalkhills Digest #4-79

          Chalkhills Digest, Volume 4, Number 79

                   Saturday, 9 May 1998

Today's Topics:

            Anyone ever heard of this album???
                     Dave, of course
              Colin Moulding calls it quits
                     Enough is enough
             The Good, The Bad & The Chuffed
            Negativity or thoughtful analysis
              My last word on the subject...
                  oh, ten bucks says...
            the time has come the walrus said
                  emotions on Chalkhills
              What is this mailing list for?
                  One quick response....
            Belated Sorrow (NOT a Dave post!!)
            Rehashed questions about new album
                    the Vanishing Dave
                       Hello All !!
                  Hidden Crocodile song!
                     For the NEW XTC
                Re: Chalkhills Negativity
                OK, Here's Your Chill Pill


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This is the part where all the lights flicker on.


Message-ID: <>
Date: Wed, 06 May 1998 21:29:17 -0500
From: Stephanie Klein <>
Subject: Anyone ever heard of this album???

Hello Chalkies:

I've been recieving the Chalkhills Newsletter for a couple of months
now. I've been an XTC fan since the early 80s and I thought I've heard
them all, but I was visiting this site...
and I was browsing all the lyrics to XTC songs when I came upon an album
entitled "Bull With Golden Guts" listing many XTC songs that I've never
heard of.  Has anyone ever heard of this album?  Is it, indeed, an XTC
album? And if so, where can I find it? Your help would be greatly



Message-Id: <>
Date: Wed, 06 May 1998 23:28:50 -0400
From: Joshua Hall-Bachner <>
Subject: Dave, of course

On the ongoing discussion regarding Dave:

I'd just like to throw my chips in Harrison Sherwood's corner. His points
in #4-76 said exactly what I thought about the whole thing. IMHO,
speculating about "fault" or offering up opinions on what XTC "should be"
or "should do" is silly, pointless, and somewhat juvenile. While I can
certainly see that people would be disappointed, I think a lot of people
need to put this in perspective.

I'd also like to note that, after Bill Berry left R.E.M. in November, the
R.E.M. newsgroup saw very similar discussions, including the same kind of
ridiculous "the band should break up -- they'll never be 'the same'" posts.
I don't think anyone called Michael Stipe an asshole, however.

/---------------------------Joshua Hall-Bachner---------------------------\
|   |
| "We all have our idiosyncracies -- maybe thinning hair, or gum disease."|
\---- Kowanko, "Will You Come To?" ------ Thank You, And Goodnight. ------/


Message-Id: <v03007801b1777d8f4f01@[]>
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 16:13:40 +0100
From: Adamek Philip <>
Subject: Colin Moulding calls it quits

I am distraught to have to be the one to inform fellow Chalkhill subscribers
of this massive blow to the group as we know it.  (Or will I really be the
first?) Apparently -- this has yet to be confirmed with absolute certainty--
artistic differences are at the root of this most recent defection.  So I
had it from someone who is connected with Abbey Road Studios.  If Colin's
leaving is permanent, then that leaves Andy to go it alone.

However, I think we fans have reason not to despair.  First of all, Colin is
a mature adult, and he is free to pursue his own future.  Knowing him to be
a generally all-around good guy, I can't imagine that the split was a
hostile one.  Secondly, Andy has several personalities at his disposal (who
can ever forget the line, "I feel like someone else, yes I do, yes I do, yes
I do...).  Let us then take stock in this wonderful extrovert; Andy can fill
in the gaps of the studio work that Dave, and the occasional song, that
Colin, had to offer.  So be it.  I wish him, or "them", all the luck in the

I'm off to lick my wounds.   Please send me info. once you have it, anyone.



Message-Id: <>
From: "J. D. SMX" <>
Organization: Access Tucson
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 10:53:36 -0700
Subject: Stereolab-a-go-go

Hi Chalkmeisters,

> Subject: Re: Stereolab
> >Anyone else here caught the Stereolab bug?
> Yes, I thoroughly enjoy _Dots and Loops_.  I'm still looking for a
> used copy of _Emperor Tomato Ketchup_.  I heard it at a friend's pad
> and enjoyed it.

Wierd! I was just in the CD store on Tuesday night with a used copy
of Dots and Loops in my hand.  Heading for the register I realized I
was out of checks....Doh!      Put it back, turned tail and booked.
Guess I'll be going back today.  Hope it's techno or like PWEI.

L8r,  SMX


Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 13:55:27 -0400 (EDT)
From: Sean Hennessey <>
Subject: Royalties
Message-ID: <>

Hallo all,

From: KB 305 <>:  <<Dave's JOB was to play guitar (and other
instruments) for XTC, a band that doesn't play live, that makes records
only rarely, and doesn't enjoy a large degree of commercial sucess.  On
top of that, he doesn't write songs for XTC, so he collects no royalties
(as if royalties weren't a sore enough subject re XTC).  Dave moonlights
occasionally; we all know when and where.>>

Actually, not true.  He does get performance royalties, which, whilst
nowhere near as large as songwriting, is something.  I've friends who
still receive these for airplay of tracks around the world.  Never much,
but none of my friends are even XTC sized.  I would have to say that, even
w/o releasing anything for so long, they perf. royalties had to keep
coming (unless they were frozen with the band's assetts).  They will also
keep coming even though he's quit.  With a band of XTC's size, these
royalties had to amount to something (well, more than the $.20 - $1.20 my
friends would earn), though not enough to live on.

Does anyone know the nature of XTC's publishing split?  I would also be
rather surprised if Dave didn't receive some sort of arrangement cut of
the songwriting royalties.  This is standard and most bands, even with a
tyranical songwriter, tend to have them, to help prevent mutiny.

tara - sean
Sean Hennessey, President of Boston Reds,
Member and co-admin of the Red Devils list:
e-mail: or ICQ: 9288628


From: MFa2707621 <>
Message-ID: <>
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 13:55:21 EDT
Subject: Enough is enough


I just read the latest Chalkhills, and I'm amazed with all the things people
are saying.  I know that people have to share their opinions about Dave, but I
think it's going overboard.  There must be something else to discuss besides
Dave's departure.  I don't know what, but someone could suggest something.

I think I was the one who started the Andy fans vs. Dave fans, and I didn't
mean to start it.  I was just voicing my opinion.  I hope Dave does well, and
I'll buy any solo work he does.

For the person who's upset about people censoring their opinions about Dave.
I don't think anybody would do that.  I think some people (including myself)
are getting tired of talking about Dave leaving, but I don't think Relph will
stop anybody talking about it.

This is hopefully the last time I mention Dave leaving in my posting.  Bye
for now.


My Favorite XTC Song - Grass (Skylarking)


Message-Id: <>
Date: Thu, 07 May 1998 13:30:26 -0500
From: John A Lane <>
Subject: The Good, The Bad & The Chuffed

Fellow denizens of the Algonquin Chalkcircle:

I'll keep this short, sweet, & random.

@ I grieve about the loss of Dave Gregory. However, as so many of you have
pointed out, it *is* just a rockband and life *does* go on. When I begin to
get a bit down about the whole thing, I then recall that it's been about 6
years since the last album anyway -- (in 6 years, the Beatles went from
"Please, Please Me" to "Let It Be") -- and so if XTC had been broken up
already, who would really know the difference? If not for Chalkhills, we
might not have known. So let's band together, not be so divided. Enough with
the competitive grieving.

@ Enough too of the psychological portraits of the band. We all have
composite images of AP, CM, and DG from songs & interviews, but we don't
know 'em.

@ Insider Mitch "Mal Evans-Wannabe To XTC" Friedman wrote "How would you
all feel if someone decides to print out the last four or fives digests and
mail them to Andy and Dave? Would you take back what you said? Too late."
Am I the only one who gets a laugh out of this self-annointed handslapper?
puh-leeze don't print this out! I beg ya!
Mitch, please return to Mr. Partridge's shed & massage his feet with a
pumice stone & peel him a grape & tell him that we all love him truly, and
if it makes him feel any better, we all love his little pal Yazbek too, and
that we're really, honestly, truly chuffed.
A bit of knitting would do you good, Mitch.
Question for Mitch: How would YOU feel if we sent Andy Partridge a snapshot
of you dressed in a "Tito Jackson Rules" t-shirt? Huh? HUH?

@ Harrison Sherwood: Am looking for an anagram for "gazpacho". Please
assist. Godspeed.

@ Dave Gregory: Good luck, and know that you've given us 20 years of
fantastic music. Somewhere in this world, right now, there's someone
marveling at your great contributions to XTC.

I love XTC "just the same as they was before they was."


Subject: Mitch
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 19:33:22 +0100 (BST)
Message-Id: <>
From: Boodle Boodle Boodle <>

wow - thank you mitch

i think that one e.mail made this whole dave leaving thing come into some
kind of perspective. i've been worrying about what andy or dave - or even
colin - would think about the things that have been said in this list
recently. one can't help but think they wouldn't have been completely
"chuffed" about it.

oh and on an unrelated matter - i spied a copy of andy's solo album (the
thing with all the swimmers on the cover, right) - it was on sale for a
tenner so is this a reasonable price. also i picked up a cd single of
wrapped in grey for a pound or so as well - is this valuable, cos the guy in
the record shop obviously didn't think so? just wondered..



Message-Id: <v04003a01b177b52dd48c@[]>
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 12:27:48 -0700
From: David Haakenson <>
Subject: Negativity or thoughtful analysis

It's always interesting and predictable that when bad things happen, some
complain that "we should be more positive", ala Molly from the last bit of

No offense meant, but there is nothing wrong with analyzing events and
judging them less than desirable. And there is no reason everything has to
be seen as positive, nor does any analysis require positive findings. Stuff
happens, and when it does, people talk about it. Chill-pill,
happy-happy-joy-joy limits on the talk are not useful. And sometimes,
negativity causes creativity to knuckle down and rise to greater levels.

That said, this is just a band, and music never dies. They're creative
people whose labors have delighted but may never have been meant as a
birth-to-grave endeavor for them. Some of us were fortunate enough (old
enough? :) to start buying their records in 1977 and have heard, watched
and read all the goodies they've released. As we watch Paul McCartney
become the Guy Lombardi or Lawrence Welk of a new generation, let's wish
Dave a happy, creative and fulfilling future. He may not want to waste his
best years in a band with a limited but highly creative and listenable
future, one with few releases and touring possibilities.

It was a good ride. Can't wait to see what Partridge and Moulding do next.
I'll purchase whatever it is. And one has to thank Virgin for putting up
with them for so long. Thank goodness that Branson liked them, or they'd
have been on a tiny label, with limited releases, no special packaging
singles, limited marketing, few opportunities, ... hey, just like they are

In the US, we call 'em Garage Bands. In the UK, they're Shed Bands?



Message-Id: <>
Date: Thu, 07 May 1998 14:36:15 -0500
From: "Kim E. Williams" <>
Subject: My last word on the subject...

Hello again.

I'm back from my self-imposed short hibernation, but I just couldn't let it
go without putting in another word on the subject of everyone's reaction to
the news of Dave Gregory leaving.  Mitch put it very well when he said that
"none of you would be here if it weren't for" Andy and that he's also one
of our favorite artists. Thanks to Mitch and a number of others, we have a
wonderful opportunity to have a contact with said favorite artists.  Thanks
Mitch for keeping me at least informed!

I would like to go a couple of steps further, though and respond directly
to the shots levelled at Andy for no real apparent reason.  People who are
incredibly creative have a very strong tendency to look at their creations
(be it a Hallmark card or an oil painting or even a song or a novel) as a
part of themselves.  A part that they had to rip out in order to complete
the process of getting it done.  To randomly assume, that just because the
creator is protective of their work, they're some sort of monster to be
around is NOT fair.  You'll never realize what's involved until you try it.
 I know what it feels like because I've written a couple of novels with my
writing partner.

Okay, now it's gonna seem like I'm changing sides here, but I'm not.  The
people who have labelled Andy as the bad guy are definitely wrong, IMO.
But I know the biggest flaw I have as a human is to try to fill in the
blanks with what "could be" rather than with what "is" when there is a lack
of information.  Tried to do that when my dad died, but it didn't work.
And it won't work here.  Not trying to compare this with a death, but it
*is* a major change in something I care very much about.  People can't help
but wonder what effects a major change is gonna have on things.

So I guess what I'm saying is I understand both sides, but there should be
some care exercised when making judgements on people or things that we know
nothing about, okay?  Thanks!  Now let's make up and get on with it!!!



Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 16:01:31 -0400 (EDT)
From: "Paul E. Brantley" <>
Subject: oh, ten bucks says...
Message-ID: <>

...we haven't heard the last from Dave Gregory as XTC band member. Those
guys are family and love each other. So it's no fun sitting at the little
kid's table with nothing to do -- particularly after 6 years of starving.

By the way, I remember reading a few years ago that Andy really encouraged
Dave to contribute some of his own instrumental tunes -- ones Andy thought
were wonderful.

I would close with something like,"I'd like That", but I won't.



From: Skylark292 <>
Message-ID: <>
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 16:13:56 EDT
Subject: the time has come the walrus said

To those of you who aren't exactly crushed by Dave's departure and who are
already bored/annoyed and impatient with those of us who are, I'd just like to
say, how about a little patience and tolerance?  Dave was an integral part of
XTC for nearly 20 years, and  I think that it's only natural that some of us
would feel sad and upset about him leaving the band and feel the need to
express it.  And if we can't vent our feelings about anything pertaining to
XTC here, where can we vent them?  So bear with us, okay?  Besides, just as
much space if not more was devoted to that silly "Is Dave gay?" thread last
year and everyone survived that, didn't they?  And Dave may have left the band
back in March but I myself only found out about it a few days ago.   So I'm
still adjusting to the news.   I can't help it if I feel sad that my favorite
guitarist will no longer be a part of my favorite band.
I really like Michael's idea about sending our best wishes to Dave via snail
mail, so I hope that those with an inside track on XTC will post an address
that we can send them to.  I also like his perspective on Dave's leaving.  I
agree - rather than continue to mourn Dave's departure from XTC, it's far
better to celebrate all the years he was with them and look ahead to the
future for whatever comes next from him and his former bandmates.

Joy - feeling a little better after swallowing a few chill pills :-)


Message-Id: <>
Date: Thu, 07 May 1998 20:28:48 +0100
From: The Larsons <>
Subject: emotions on Chalkhills

> Mitch wrote:
> First of all . . . Dave left on March 16th. It is now May 5th. Relax.

Most of us on the list didn't hear about it until last week so the recent
outbursts here are only natural.

> Secondly . . . although some of you may feel the need to say nasty and
> critical things about Andy, none of you would be here if it weren't for
> him. He's also a friend of mine. He's also one of your favorite
> artists. Imagine if you will the scenario in which the personal lives of all
> of your favorite songwriters, authors, directors, actors, politicians,
> musicians, teachers, etc. were revealed.  How many of these people would you
> still be enthusiastic about supporting once you found out that, shockingly,
> each and every one of them was a flawed human being?  Imagine the dismay
> when you all figure out that you are in that same category.  AND THERE IS
> NOTHING WRONG WITH IT. How would you all feel if someone decides to print
> out the last four or fives digests and mail them to Andy and Dave? Would you
> take back what you said? Too late.

If it's possible to love someone you've never even met, then I love Andy.
He's certainly given me many hours of tremendous pleasure over the
years through his music.  But those we love are often the first we find
flaws with.  I certainly agree with you that people should think about
what they've written before hitting the 'send' button but an emotional
reaction to a major personnel change in a band we're so devoted to is
hardly surprising.  I think any band member who reads fan newsgroups or
e-mail lists would have to have a very thick skin.  It might be worth
it for all the praise they would hear but I suspect if the internet existed
2,000 years ago, even would have had plenty of criticism on it.

As long as I'm making this rare posting, I'd like to thank you, Mitch,
and Peter F. and all the rest who take the time to share their inside
knowledge of XTC and make Chalkhills essential reading for the true fan.


* ------------------------------
Larson Family Web Page:
* ------------------------------


Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 16:10:39 -0500 (EST)
From: Kara N Berryman <>
Subject: What is this mailing list for?
Message-ID: <>

For everyone who is either pouting and/or complaining about the content of
this list, my question is:  IS THIS OR IS THIS NOT THE FANS' LIST TO
DISCUSS MATTERS RELATED TO XTC?  Anything that is XTC related and of
interest for other fans, right?  Good, bad, and ugly.  And it wasn't
created for the band's information and pleasure, right?

just wondering....

I suppose everyone has the right to complain equally, so I thought I would
add my two cents.

Thanks for listening!


From: LadyCPlum <>
Message-ID: <>
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 17:14:24 EDT
Subject: One quick response....

Rob-So...will I buy the new album? The answer is OF COURSE I WILL! And if XTC
puts out more stuff after this, I'll buy that too. Colin and Andy ARE still
around, after all, and the lyrics will be just as witty and creative.

XTC song of the day-Everything
non XTC song-As Long As We Believe-Siedah Garrett


From: Rhoblidnen <>
Message-ID: <>
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 18:21:25 EDT
Subject: Belated Sorrow (NOT a Dave post!!)


I just spent half an hour downloading CRASH4.AVI, the footage of Andy
walking offstage in Paris.  Being a youngy 'n' everything, it's just hit me
as to what a bitch touring must have been for him to drive him to that.
What's more, he looks fine (sounds _terrible!_) until the last second.  It's
scary that fame/exposure has such a horrid effect on some people.

Watching it again, what a bastard it must have been for all of them.  To be
around someone that has been so sodded by doing what they should love.  To
be the actual person!  It all looked so smooth and slick, though, didn't it?
The White Horse artwork on the backcloth and the bass drum.

It gives me a strange feeling to see the other three carry on after he
leaves.  It's like someone still standing, toothless, after having been
unexpectedly punched unconscious before falling over.  I'm glad the KO
didn't last long.

It's like I can see this window of opportunity.  Andy can either stay on
stage and be commercially successful but unhappy, or he can remain sane and
at the cult status stage (I hate that phrase too).

Does anyone know how much longer they carried on after that?  Did they
finish the song or did it just peter out?  It looks heartbreaking to me.
Like I said, this only hit me when I saw the footage a few minutes ago.

Before anyone says anything, I'm not saying I didn't like the way the band
went after this point.  These are just observations about what happened and
my attempt at empathy.



Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 15:41:38 -0700 (PDT)
From: Misty Shock <>
Subject: Rehashed questions about new album
Message-ID: <>

Hi!  Just curious...did "Church of Women" and "Dame Fortune" make it on
the album?  And "I'd Like That"?

Misty Shock
"No round of drinks can extinguish this feeling of love and engulfing
bliss."						--Andy Partridge


From: "Paul Vincent Allen" <>
Organization: Augustana College - Rock Island Ill
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 17:50:30 CST
Subject: the Vanishing Dave
Message-ID: <C84E12628D@AUGUSTANA.EDU>


i met the news of Dave's departure with dismay, and till now i've sat
back and read all the laments.  while his leaving is troublesome, i
agree that things will go on and this is just the next evolution
of XTC.  questions:
-does anyone know if they have plans to replace him?
-does anyone know if "Playground" is going to be on the new album? i
love that song and it surely sounds radio-ready to me, especially
with the current (American) radio scene favoring pop again.

-i found a CD at a used store called "XTC in concert".  it says "made
in Canada" on the back and i assume it's from the 1980 BBC sessions.
it is great as an album and includes "Living through another Cuba",
"Nigel", "Towers of London", and "Love at First Sight".  Am i to
assume these versions  are on the "Drums and Wireless" CD that I
haven't purchased yet?



From: Kev <>
Subject: Hello All !!
Date: Fri, 8 May 1998 12:58:09 +0100
Message-ID: <01bd7a78$92267520$LocalHost@default>

Hi all,
        My name is Kevin and this is my first posting to chalkhills, I have
been reading the list for about two weeks now and this is the first message
I have sent. I am so glad I have found you all, I look forward to the
regular digest. I am 20 Years old and have been a fan of XTC for abou 9
years now, I have all their albums and I can probably say that Skylarking is
my favorite. From what I can gather many of you dont know any other fans of
XTC other than those on the list, Well my whole family like XTC so I am
quite lucky in that respect. My clame to fame when it comes to XTC is that I
live 15 miles south of SWINDON in Wiltshire , I have never seen XTC in the
flesh but my mum once saw Andy in Marlborough (thats a local town inbetween
me and swindon) in the late eighties.

I am very interested to know more about the people subscribed to the list.
Is there anyone who has contact directly with XTC?? Do XTC read the list?. I
would really love to have short E-Mail from you all saying your name,
location, favorite Album etc. and anything else you would care to add, i
would really appreciate that. I currently have no idea of the size or
diversity of the list.

Contact me at -

I am so glad I have found the list and I think it is a credit to XTC. I am
awfully disappointed abt Dave leaving, his influences over the sound are
obvious, especially on Skylarking. In Chris Twoemy`s book it does make Andy
out to be a hard kind of chap to work with but at the end of the day each
album would be very different if the producers had more control . Andys
production and domination has given us the albums we all love and lest we
not forget that we are all here because of XTC and Andy is 75% of XTC.

I look forward to posting again soon.

Kevin Lancaster.


Message-Id: <>
Date: Thu, 07 May 1998 20:32:29 -0500
From: "Jason 'Buffy' NeSmith" <>
Subject: Hidden Crocodile song!

When I first read Herr. Harrison's assignment regarding the secondary song
within 'Crocodile,' I didn't know whether he was chuffing my chuff or
keeping it real.  Until today when I read his posting again and meditated on
the song...
Then my eyes sprang open, and my hand repeatedly shot into the air so fast
that my tiny 4th grade body was sent bouncing on the seat of my one-piece
schooldesk/chair combination, achieving a height of approximatly 4
centimeters per bounce.
Ooh!  Ooh!  Call on me!
Well, I admit that I don't know the actual name of the
'hidden-in-plain-sound' song, but it's the one that goes with the playground
smash hit 'There's a place in France where the naked ladies dance.'
Does that count???   Can I go to the restroom now?  All that excitement made
me hafta go reeeal bad.

I'm not even going to mention David Gregory.


currently digging: An Evening with Wild Man Fischer

The Orange Hat Electronic House of Floppy Fun...
Lookit Meee! rekkids...


From: "Gene Rife" <grife.R.STU.VU@ARTEMIS.VALPO.EDU>
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 20:54:35 -0600
Subject: For the NEW XTC
Message-ID: <>

Allright... I've listend to a small portion of people talk about
replacing dearly departed Dave... I've also heard people say that
Dave shouild not be replaced, since he is simple irreplaceable... I
agree with the latter.. HOWEVER... I also agree with the fact that a
new member that would hold the place that Dave once held would help
to move the band into a new direction.. Open a new chapter, as it has
been put so nicely so many times... So, just as something for all you
red brick dreamers out there, here's my list of nominations for that
place.. I'd be interested in hearing what people have to think about

1. Allright this one has been mentioned already but I really like the
idea... Thomas Dolby.

2. What about our good friend Danny Elfman... he is definately shares
XTC's eclecticnisity both lyricaly and musically...

3. Gary Numan... just kidding

4. Elvis Costello... more of a lyrisist than a musician though.. not
to say he's not a good musician. I'd like to see it anyway

5. T.V.'s ALF... ok i know what you're thinking, but it WOULD take
the band in a whole new direction...

6. Here's one... Aimee Mann... could be VERY interesting there...

7. John Lennon, right, i know, he's dead... but that doesn't change
the fact that he would a lot to this "beatles based pop" band

8. Roland Orzibal... (crikey, i hope i spelled his name right)

9. Kublai Kahn... a former emeror of the Tartars would bring an
entierly new chapter to the band, and probably close soon there after
when he get's pissed and has them all killed... forget i sugessted

10. Andrew Ridgely.. what's he been up to these days? (for those of
you who dont know who i'm talking about I'll use his more common
name.. "the other guy from "WHAM!"")

Obviously not all of these are serious ideas, BUT all would be
wonderfull additions to fit Dave's old seat... no, to put in a new
seat, next to dave's old one, that will forever be vacent and missed.


Message-ID: <>
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 23:33:15 EDT
Subject: Re: Chalkhills Negativity

Chalkhills has gotten old the last few issues. Everyone is shocked at what
happened and everyone I'm sure feels the need to give their opinion, but the
negativity is bad. This band was together 20 years as we know it, and they
were incredible. We do not know what happened. We should be celebrating their
accomplishments and be grateful that the new stuff will still be coming out,
and that Dave finished his material, his last hurrah I guess. Dave must have
really been pissed off though, because their future is (was?)bright right now.
This forum was designed to celebrate the most incredible and underappreciated
bands of our time I thought. I am grateful that the fab three have stayed
together this long, considering the adversity in their history (some self-
inflicted of course). I thank the three of them and wish Dave luck (maybe
he'll reconsider?)      Fred , Tampa
XTC Song of the day:  In Loving memory of a Name


Message-Id: <>
From: "Noble K Thomas" <>
Subject: XTCDs
Date: Fri, 8 May 1998 13:46:24 -0500

I have 5 copies of the new XTC Greatest Hits CD from Japan. It is a limited
edition so at some point all sources will dry up I suppose. Also available:
DUFFY (full CD and CD single) / Yazbek (Tock is brilliant! & Laughing Man)
/ Martin Newell (GLE & OW) and the Testimonial Dinner. Also the Cathy
Dennis (CD and singles). E-mail me privately for more info.

Sad to see Dave go. Maybe he'll pop up with a cool instrumental recording
soon. If it had to happen then it seems like a shame that this didn't go
down years ago. In fact, it makes me wonder if Andy could have released a
solo project outside of his contractual committments to Virgin that for so
long hindered any new music!

There is noone to blame. Shit happens. All the rest is good...


Message-ID: <>
Date: Fri, 08 May 1998 17:08:59 -0400
From: Harrison Sherwood <>
Subject: OK, Here's Your Chill Pill

You may recall a few lifetimes ago--you know, before they changed the
water--I threw down the gauntlet to my fellow Bedlamites, pointing out that
"Crocodile" contained a second, "secret" song, and enjoining the musically
alert among us to Name That Tune.

Well, to say the response has been overwhelming is not to fail to say too

Yes, I had to put my crack secretarial staff, Mona the Loaner, on
double-time pay to handle the (oh, let's see, carry the twelve, six nines is
seventeen, righty tighty lefty loosie) FOUR responses I received in the past
week to this exciting and challenging opportunity to win valuable prizes and
the grudging admiration of all assembled.

The four respondents were (in order) Mitch Friedman (nearly right but far
too mordant for consideration), Richard Pedretti-Allen (nearly right as far
as I could decipher), Mark Cuevas (somewhere in the ballpark but slightly in
need of Viagra: "It's a low male voice singing some type of countermelody"),
and Jason "Buffy" NeSmith (absolutely correct: "Can I go to the restroom
now?").  (Note to "Buffy": Yes. And if you're not back in three minutes I'm
sending the hall monitor after you. We don't want any repetitions of last
time, do we?)

All four of you are to be commended highly for your efforts; however, none
of you actually managed to *name* the song!

"Buffy" was the closest to the mark:

> it's the one that goes with the playground
> smash hit 'There's a place in France where the naked ladies dance.'

I don't know where you get "naked ladies," Buffster (perhaps your
grade-school recesses attracted a more libertine clientele than mine); I'd
always heard it as "where the *crocodiles* dance," which, you gotta admit,
closes the circle quite neatly.

Yes, the part that is sung over the coda, "Crocodile with your jaded jealous
smile," is in fact "that" song. Mitch pointed out that the great Raymond
Scott quoted the same melody in his 1937 "Twilight in Turkey." And yes, Mark
Cuevas correctly points out that the tune also appears as the nearly
inaudible countermelody in the second bridge ("But he's your pet now/You
can't run away and hide").

But that still leaves us with the correct *identification* of the tune,
doesn't it. And here we come to perhaps the knottiest part of this most
vexacious problem. In his classic and timeless text "_Lib vi. c. 2"_,"
Valerius Maximus writes, "Inserit se tantis viris mulier alienigeni
sanguinis: quae a Philippo rege temulento immerenter damnata, Provocarem ad
Philippum, inquit, sed sobrium," which, when placed in juxtaposition with
Martin's observation in "Histoire de France," "Pour vous avertir comment se
porte le ressort de mon infortune, de toutes choses ne m'est demeure que
l'honneur et la vie,--qui est sauve," will doubtless prove my theory that if
you cut-and-paste two long foreign quotes from Bartlett's Online into any
one given paragraph, no one will ever read to the end to find out that I
don't actually have any fucking idea what the name or origin of that song
is. I was sort of hoping you'd all be able to tell me, actually. I was
faking. Whaddya want, your money back?

(I have emailed the owner of the Raymond Scott website for elucidation, and
Mitch promises he'll ask Andy next time they chat. Honestly, I thought I'd
be able to track it down in a day or two, seeing as how I'm the Alpha
Internet Research Geek of the Western World, but let's see *you* try to
track down the composer of a piece, armed only with a few hummed notes and a
snippet of playground doggerel!)

And now this goober:

> From:

> Harrison, I think a "gigasecond" is almost 32 years.  I'll be retiring
> when the next cymbal sings.

[That reminds me: Grand Funk Railroad is reuniting!]

Ah. Light dawns. Giga. Nano. Not the same thing. Hmm. Stupid Greek prefixes.
Stupid metric system. Stupid Enlightenment. Stupid international scientific
standardization of hitherto irrational medieval systems of weights and
measures. Stupid keyboard. Stupid internet. I'm going home.

I guess this might go a long way to explaining the somewhat derisive note in
Ilse von Staempferdt-Ebbing's maidenly tittering last week when I let slip,
with waggling eyebrows and a salacious leer, that my manly pride and joy was
a whopping 12 millimeters in its proud glory.

And lastly:

Jason 'Buffy' NeSmith wrote:
> currently digging: An Evening with Wild Man Fischer

Oh, man! The *thinking man's* Captain Beefheart! Let's do three weeks on

Harrison "Yeah! A-and it's six angstroms around, baby!" Sherwood


End of Chalkhills Digest #4-79

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